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Journal Entry: Wed Jun 23, 2010, 12:38 PM
"Hey, Bill?"

"Yes, Ted?"

"Strange things are afoot at the Circle K." :paranoid:

  • Listening to: The A/C
  • Reading: The Wellness Tree
  • Watching: The Real L Word
  • Playing: G Hero
  • Eating: nothing
  • Drinking: Powerade

Your Mom Goes to Nostalgica

Journal Entry: Mon Jan 19, 2009, 7:01 PM

Hello, all. :noes:

Stopping in real quick.

So I was asked to explain my leaving Coyote and I will.

As detailed in various journals since the time I started, there was a strong degree of favoritism at Coyote Ugly I couldn't get past, and when our awesome GM got fired and the head bartender moved up, it got even worse. They tried to get rid of me by making up their own rules (some of which are actually unconstitutional without a signed waiver from the employee, which they didn't have) so I eventually left on principle. I was being paid to do other peoples' work in addition to my own and I was tired of it.

Upon my leaving, I emailed Daniel the regional manager a solid 6000 words detailing everything. As he put it in his response, even if only half the things I said were true, something needed to be done immediately.

He told me he would stay in touch but I haven't heard anything, but I'm not too disappointed considering I emailed him without any expectations. If the problems were fixed, great. If not, oh well. Shortly thereafter a number of the top bartenders quit or were unjustly fired.

I still miss the place and I'm still friends with the girls, but I've moved on.


I did Borders Books for a month as seasonal work in December with the potential for moving to full/part-time when the season ended.

On my last day they caught me as I clocked out and said, "Oh, by the way, this is your last day" which was a real dick move, but they told me there simply weren't enough hours at the moment, that I was still on rehire status and they wanted me to reapply in 2 months.

So I will.

Great benefits. No drama. Great people.

They have an employee "library" system of sorts. Employess can check out any book for two weeks at a time, a maximum of two books at a time. This would be handy for school books, but is also useful for getting a chance to read all those new bestsellers that come out so we can make product recommendations without having to spend $100 a month on books.

Many other benefits.


So I was just let go from Borders and I was standing there trying to figure out what to do.

Shit. Need money. I really wish they had given me at least SOME advance notice I was going to be let go.

Right across the way from Borders was Fleming's Prime Steakhouse and Wine Bar. Never been, but I knew it was a restaurant and it used to be a Zoopas, so why the hell not?

Having never been inside, I could tell what kind of place it was from the fact that they have a valet, so I tucked in my collared button-up shirt (I always wore nice shirts to Borders) and brushed my hair.

Walked in. Fuckin' nice. :|

Having never been in a Fleming's before, I had no idea what to expect, and wow...

I'm a fan of wood interiors and the restaurant swims in an ocean of wood and burgundy (colors, but I guess the wine too since it's a wine bar). Dim lights. No windows except for the 4 by the doors so the restaurant had a very intimate feels. High class.

Hostess greeted me. I asked if they were hiring for servers or bartenders. She disappeared.

Reappeared with the GM. Shook hands. We must have said 10 words. He asked me when I could come back and fill out the application and take the wine test. I said tomorrow worked perfectly.

Came back the next day at the accordant time.

Filled out the application and took the wine test. Man that test was tough :| (Appropriately so, I've come to find.)

Jim (GM) went back and graded the wine test. While he was grading the wine test, I took a gander at the drink/food/wine menus. Cheapest entree is the double-breasted chicken for $26. Most expensive is some seafood one that runs for $59. :| House specialty drinks all start at $10. Appetizers start from $10 and work up to a four-person seafood tour that is $99. A $99 appetizer. :|

I knew there was money to be made so when Jim came back and told me I got a 69 which was good, but not the required 80 to become a server/bartender and would I be interested in a busser position instead, I said definitely.

He told me to come back the next day and we would definitely do interviews.

Came back the next day. Had THE best interview I've ever had. Talking to my mom about the interview later that night, she said I inherited my father's ability to influence, which my sister and I have long known of. :D If my dad wants something to happen, there ain't shit you can do about it. :P

So basically I pitched myself to Jim. Hit all my points. Due to the events at Coyote, I definitely stressed teamwork and communication.

And then he did this interesting "test". He had a paper of prompts, one of which he would read off, and I would have to list as many things I could of think of to do to remedy the situation. So there wasn't ONE right answer, there were, like, 500. For example, a customer complains to you that the wait is taking really long. What should you do? You should not ONLY apologize, you should/could recommend they have a seat at the bar til their table is called, maybe order a drink or appetizer. You could also call a manager to speak with the person. Check the system for them to see how much longer. Was an interesting interview process.

And I nailed it. Said normally they did the interviews over a number of days but that he wanted to knock them all out now (sounds like someone had already made up their mind :3).

He left the private dining room where we were doing the interviews and stepped right outside the room to speak to Christian, another manager. I was casually observing the wine racks on the far wall about 20 feet away but I could just barely hear them talking and Jim actually used the words, "this guy is freaking amazing".


<falsetto>Nailed it!</falsetto>

Got the job. It'll all be uphill from here. Making friends (and one enemy). Jim has pulled me aside multiple times to remind me to keep things at a high pace and it won't be more than 5 weeks til I get moved up (they're BIG on crosstraining). Robert, the bar manager, casually pulled me aside at one point and complimented me on my wine test, and said that I "really impressed a lot of people" by accepting the busser position to get my foot in the door. And he told me a week later that my name came up frequently in the previous day's manager meeting, and I jokingly asked, "In good ways, I hope" and he emphatically said it was.

So... once again...

<falsetto>Nailed it!</falsetto>

I get 50% employee discount off parties of 2 (of which I am a part, of course), 33% off of parties of 3, and 25% parties of more, so you all and I need to go. The food is, of course, incredible. First time in my life I've ever considered becoming a certified sommelier.

And the rest...

Can't have good luck without bad.

Actually went out the day before yesterday with a number of Borders employees after I got off at Flemings. Was one of the Border's cashier's bdays. Went to local place (Rebar). Went back to her place. Cupcakes and Rock Band/G Hero abounded. Was told that "damn, dude, you just made that game your bitch". And then I woke up the next morning to find I'd lost my wallet. :|

All my credit cards. Social security card. License. And half of my upcoming rent. :ohmygod:

I know I had it after all was said and done because my friend Mike was giving me a ride home and we stopped at Whataburger and I pulled it out to pay... so either it's in his truck still or it fell out of the truck when I got out. Went and checked the parking lot yesterday and nothing. :C

So we'll see.

I'm going through a Backstreet Boys revival and I don't mind.

Note to all: Tried to make alcoholic pancakes on New Years (read: alcohol in the batter) and all we ended up doing was setting off the smoke alarm. :<

I'm going to pull out my camera again since I miss it. Just been so busy lately I haven't shot ANYthing.

Waiting for my damn W2 so I can do my damn taxes so I can send in my damn FAFSA. >:|

I have made zero writing progress in the last 3-4 months.

Reading "Non-Violent Resistance" by Ghandi and it's a personal perspective clash since I'm Machiavellian in every way aside from not believing that ends justify the means. If the only advocation of an argument is that the ends justify the means, any extreme can be claimed as justification. I WISH I could subscribe to ends justifying means, but that it's so easy to manipulate to one's own end is the exact reason it's not logically sound. :|

New ID :3

And since, as the adage goes, never miss a chance to shut up, I conclude.


P.S. I may not be responding to all journals and deviations, but I'm reading and scrutinizing all of them, respectively.

  • Listening to: Backstreet Boys
  • Reading: Non-Violent Resistance
  • Watching: The Daily Show
  • Playing: Cooking Dash
  • Eating: Chicken Pasta
  • Drinking: Flat Dr. Pepper

Your Mom Goes to Fleming's Prime Steakhouse

Journal Entry: Tue Jan 13, 2009, 8:00 AM

Y'all Don't Even Know!

I love you all and I'm so sorry for my recent absence. Last journal was September? :hmm: Ouch. I miss all my chats peeps and helpers. Just a little bit longer.

I'm almost not poor anymore.

Quit Coyote Ugly on principle as some may remember me saying.

Worked Seasonal at Borders which was awesome but they didn't have enough hours so they had to let me go after just a month. Said I was still in good standing on "rehire" status, so they suggested I apply in a few months.

They let me know it was my last night ON my last night, which was a bit of a dick move, but I worked it.

Walked across the parking lot to Fleming's Prime Steakhouse and Wine Bar. Asked if they were hiring. Host got the GM. GM told me to come back the next day.

Did. Filled app. Took the mandatory wine test. Sucker was difficult. I literally blanched when I got my first glimpse. I got a 69. Needed an 80 to pass. Was complimented later on my test, though. Apparently a 69 is commendable for an off-the-street test.

T/F: Malbec is commonly associated with Argentina?
Name what wine has a distinct bell pepper taste.
List five white varietal grapes (blush wines e.g. white zin, do not count)
Name a white varietal and a red varietal that go into burgundy.

That kind of stuff :|

GM said they weren't hiring for bartender or server, but asked if I wouldn't want to start at Busser and try and work up from there. I accepted. Was told later by a manager that I impressed "a lot of people" by accepting a busser position in an effort to get my foot in the door. Everyone likes me. Interview with GM was the best I've ever had. Heard him tell the manager following his interview that I was "freaking amazing". :| No lie. More detail to follow.

Nonetheless, I worked day before yesterday, yesterday, I'm on my way to do laundry, donate plasma, and then I'm off to work again today, and then tomorrow off, and then four more days of work in a row. Manager said he likes my attitude so much he wants me to work as much as possible. :P Working 7 cumulative days out of an 8 day period would show with certainty.

Typing this as fast as possible... cuz I gotta hurry.

Might be some new changes coming up in the near future here :paranoid:

Texas meet for meeting InvaderMar?! :noes: Discuss!

Soon to be not poor anymore.

(Mack, got your note. Looking into as soon as I get off here)

Much love. Hang in there. Stay smart. I'll be back in about a week, I would guess.


  • Listening to: A Perfect Circle
  • Reading: Lost Christianities
  • Watching: Soap: Season One
  • Playing: FF8
  • Eating: Baked Chicken
  • Drinking: Hot Chocolate

Your Mom Goes to Santa Barbara

Journal Entry: Wed Sep 3, 2008, 6:59 AM

Horny Toad Plz?

I love Texas.

It's not the be-all-end-all of places, but it's the shit. Sure there are other places that have aspects better than Texas, for instance England has more black people who talk like white people than Texas does. :P

Hawaii has better waterfalls.

Peru has better llamas.

Scotland has hotter website staff.

There are some givens we can all go with, but (in my experience) Texas has combined as many great things as possible as BEST as possible.

Yes, we have Bush. :| Both of them.

But don't blame Texas for Bush!

Do we blame Ohio for Charles Manson?

No, but I have the suspicion we should...

Do we blame Germany for Hitler?! No!

And yes, the inevitable Hitler reference was, well, inevitable.

I'm white; it's mandatory:…

Damn Google. Just spent the last 20 minutes looking at Shakira pics. :ohmygod:

Haggle Texas Ranger

The ineffably awesome haggleman will be touching down here in Texas in just a day.

How can you tell Texas is awesome? Everyone's coming here. Don't wanna be last, do you? :eyes:

Anyways, he's coming to stay for a few weeks which is going to be awesome.

Lulz will ensue. Many different games will be played on many different systems. Internets will be pwned.

He is of course going to have to visit the Alamo (a more modern Thermopalyae, for those who don't know) along with every other point of interest in San Antonio, not excluding Coyote Ugly, of course.

Many pictures will follow. He regrettably won't be able to hang around long enough to attend the SAN ANTONIO MEET IN OCTOBER, INFO AVAILABLE AT Texasdevmeet!!!</u>, but he will be there in spirit.

He has brought to my attention that the Maori people (haggleman is from some place called Zeeland) tend to eat people... and while he has assured me he's not Maori and thus have nothing to fear, I'm an American and so it is my heritage, nay duty, to build prejudices based on inaccurate generalizations, so I'm declaring here for all that "Maoris eat people. Maoris are Asians/Pacific Islanders. Therefore Asians/Pacific Islanders eat people."

He flies in tomorrow around noon Central Standard Time. If no one hears from me in the next few days, tell the police to start searching for an Asian guy.

Fer Ril Fer Ril.

Seems to be a thing with some people. You ask them, "For real?"

And they come back with, "For real for real." :P

Kids these days.

Though she know longer works with us, we had a girl whose Texas hick cuhntree axent was so strong...

I was working behind the bar one night washing dishes, like ya do, when the girl (I can't remember her name) comes up to me and waves me over, like ya do.

And I went over.

"Hey," she said, "do you have a ladder?"

"No. What do you need a ladder for?"

"To lat my cigarette."

Fer ril fer ril. :|

ANOTHER Incomplete Beginning

Was at work last week and suddenly an idea hit me. Idea for another screenplay (yes, ANOTHER).

I still had a few hours to go before I got off work, but when I did get off, I went next door to Rio Rio (Mexican place, natch) and busted out with a spiral a carry around (for moments such as that) and spat out, like, 15 pages. I finished my food, went home, and churned out another 10 pages. 25 pages may not seem like a lot for a rough draft, but when you write prose, you can wander on a first draft. You have more space to fill than with a screenplay, but prose is so descriptive, it goes by fast.

25 screenplay pages? That can take hours and hours. And... well, did, but it was all straight out without almost any hesitation. 25 wide-rule pages is equal to about 15 pages in a script, and right on the money that's where the first act turning point occurs... so I like to think I've gotten better at screenwriting (even if it was all of a sudden). To not only be able to spit out the first 15 pages of a screenplay in two days but to do so within the confines of a three-act structure is... nice.

And Stephanie read a couple pages the next night without me knowing (it was sitting out at work as I was proofing it) and she told me was "incredible". :3

I realize to non-writers I might seem as if I'm just stroking myself right now, but (a) I think that's what I need to counter some things in my life at the moment, and (b) writers will understand the ego boost attained from creating something good in such a blazingly fast amount of time that not even THEY know what happened.

It's awesome.

I Know I've Been Working Out, But Come On...

Was working the other day and Rosie was behind the bar with me.

And we were just talking casually... and out of nowhere, she says, with a tinge of Hispanicism, "You know, if we dinna work here [and thus weren't subject to the no-fraternization policy], I'd totally go out with you."

Um... thanks, Rosie. :paranoid: Must be some good soda you got there, huh?

Wanna share whatever it is you're smoking? :eyes:

So that was nice.

And then the next morning, I was sitting upstairs eating lunch with George and he set his food down for a second, which I noticed but I initially attributed only to him digesting.

And he said, also with a signiciant Hispanic accent, "What are you doing here, doggie?"

(He calls everyone doggie.)

"I'm eating my sesame chicken." :|

Shakes his head. Does a deny gesture with his hand. "I mean, what're you doing here? If I ha' your potential, your skills..." Shakes his head again.

And that was nice of him. We talked for about 20 more minutes about various things related to why we both worked where and what were planning to do about it. :shrug:

And THEN!!

I was with Stephanie (see pic above) the other night at work and we were doing our thing, and I apparently did something really right because she turned to me and said, "If I'm not married when I'm 35, will you marry me?"


Yes, Stephanie. I do. :P

My first time as someone's backup spouse.

And This Is My Associate, Ovaltine Jenkins

So I've been picking up some weird things lately.

A penny. A syringe. A tramp. :P

No, but really. So I was working a day shift the other day, right? Working with Amy.

I was hungry and the manager said I could go get food, so I asked the girls I was working with if they wanted anything. I always ask whenever I'm going to go somewhere and suggestions I give the girls range from coffee and candy to hookers and Mexican food.

Well... on this day. I walked up to Amy, told her I was going to get stuff, and asked her what she wanted. She started to think... and I rattled off, "Coffee, pizza, hookers..." And then for some reason, I said stamps. :|

I've never asked someone if I could get them stamps before. :|

And she said, "Yeah, actually, I do. I need to pay my mortgage today. How did you know?"

I don't know. :| So I got her stamps.

That was weird.

And THEN!!

I texted Gina because I haven't seen her in forever. She still works a few shifts now and then, but she's mostly a teacher now.

And I opened the initial text message with, "Hey, Gina Bean. Whatchu up to?"

And she replied with, "Wow. I haven't been called that in 7 years. My best friend in California used to call me that."

Not sure why I called her that name. I've known her for about a year now and I've never called her that before that text.

So that was weird.

And THEN!!!!!!!!

So I was in the office last week right before I came on for the night shift, right? Chilling in the office which a bunch of the girls, and once more Stephanie was near me. And, without any reason whatsoever, I turned to her and said, "Monkeybutt". :|

I don't know why. I've never called anyone that before. She's never mentioned it before (it's a pretty memorable phrase).

And she immediately turns to me and says, "How did you know?" :|

And I said, "I'm not sure. Know what?"

And she said, "That I'm 'monkeybutt'." My sister used to call me that, but I haven't talked to her in over a year. That's our thing. She calls me monkeybutt and I call her monkeyfuck."

Her explanation of the names was more in-depth but I won't go into it here...

So that was weird, as well. :o Blurting out things I wouldn't normally ever say and having them be massively relevant unknowns.


Fer ril fer ril.

  • Listening to: Shakira
  • Reading: Advanced Screenwriting - Dr. Linda Seger
  • Watching: Psych: Season Three
  • Playing: Sims 2
  • Eating: Enchiladas
  • Drinking: Sunkist Orange Soda :D

Long Story... :|

Journal Entry: Wed Sep 3, 2008, 6:27 AM


I suck dick for coke!

  • Listening to: Disco--what else?
  • Reading: Underworld -- Graham Hancock
  • Watching: Veronica Mars: Season One
  • Playing: Adobe Premiere, cuz it's fun. :3
  • Eating: Pasghetti
  • Drinking: Pepsi and Gatorade. Both with Sweet &amp; Low

Your Mom Goes to Taco Cabana... On Purpose...

Journal Entry: Thu Jul 17, 2008, 5:20 AM

Not like speed dating, but as in speed updates.

I got Rockband. It rocks. I can only comfortably sing 2-3 songs in their original octave (I don't like when things are sung out of their original octave) which irks me, but the drumming kicks ass. 5-starred most of Medium on the first try. Now working on Hard.

Zooey Deschanel still has not called me or showed up on my doorstep or at my work.

I am disappointed, but will not lose hope.

Writing continues at its normal, erratic pace. During a phone conversation with my mother the other day, she commented that she had been talking to my sister about me and they had both come to the realization that neither of them have read any of my work. Kinda showed me how much I harbor my stuff. :P Guess I should change that? :hmm:

I wasn't there for disco, but I still really miss it.

Had Taco Cabana a few weeks ago. Woke later that night with... intestinal problems. Saw some things in the ceramic that shouldn't have been there. Thought I was going to have to go to the hospital. Worst-case colon polyps scenario imagined (yes it was that bad). Waited a day. It subsided. Read on internet some processed RED salsas don't digest and go out how they come in. Move to pass vote that such salsas be banned. Not eating at Taco Cabana for a long time.

I wish the world would stop being so rational and making so much sense. When guns fire, they should emit baby geese. When people decide it's okay to be the mister/mistress in a couple's marriage, they should throw up baby geese. And we need selective breeding. And baby geese.

The music channel is so strapped for info about artists, it just told me "Wal-Mart is the largest music retailer in the world", something I doubt... Their selection sucks.

Oh, and people need to find better things to do with their time than passive aggressively try to piss each other off.

"I Ain't As Good As I Once Was..."

A good country song. Go Toby. And a troof because... I can't do it like I used to be able to.

I am of course talking about "sweet shotting" soda. Allow me to explain.

This is similar to the Diet Soda and Mentos tricks, except that (in moderation) the soda is still perfectly drinkable. Most people don't know that ANY carbonated sugared drink will work, and a variety of objects and substances will produce the "nucleation" needed to undergo the fizziness.

Believe it or not, I discovered this process by accident years ago when I worked at Six Flags as a sound engineer, years before that infamous viral video ever caught, if I may brag a bit. On a whim, I placed a packet of Sweet & Low in one of the many free refills of soda I got and I found it caused a massive fizzing of my drink. When the fizzing had subsided, the result was a sweeter less-carbonated soda, one I could consume faster in the time allotted between shows because the decrease in carbonation made the soda burn significantly less when I chugged it. And no Sweet & Low does not "flatten" the soda, I prefer to think of it as a "soda softener".

Regardless, if Sweet & Low is placed in a bottle or liter of soda, the reaction combined with the closed space (as compared to an open glass) creates a violent eruption similar to that of the Diet Coke+Mentos thingamajig.

It should be noted here that Firefox recognizes "thingamajig" as a legitimate word.

Discreetly slipping a packet of Sweet & Low into someone's bottle of beer when they're not looking meets with hilarious results as well. Beer. Everywhere.

ANYWAYS, I've been putting Sweet & Low in my drinks for the last 4 years and haven't looked back. There's a trick to it in that when you dump a packet (or two, as I eventually graduated to the next level) in a bottle of soda, you must have the cap ready to screw on as fast as possible or the soda will erupt everywhere. And as happens, there were times when I slipped with the cap, or dropped it altogether. :| So soda would not go everywhere, the next course of action was to clamp one's mouth over the top of the soda and try to engorge as much of the bubbles as possible to make as little a mess as possible.

In college...


...after some friends saw me do this, I invited them to a friendly competition. A number of people each purchase a two-liter of soda. Each person then combines three packets of Sweet & Low into one packet. Simultaneously, each person dumps their "combined" packet into his/her respective two-liter and immediately places his/her mouth securely over the top of the bottle.

Goal of the game is to be the person to keep their mouth over the top of the bottle as long as possible without gagging, throwing up, or letting any soda otherwise escape the mouth.

It's LOADS of fun, and it's hilarious to watch because all of these people are suddenly having tons of fizz rushing into their mouth and they're trying to swallow it as fast as possible but it's almost all carbonation and they can't swallow air so they have to burp it out but they can't burp without losing so they have to burp out their nose but their nose is blocked by the streams of soda pouring out of it. :lmao: And people's eyes when they do it, when the fizz rushes into their mouth and they get that, "What the hell was I thinking agreeing to this?" bug-eyed look. And they always come back to do it again.

So original point of this section...

I was at work a few weeks ago. For those who don't know--I'm not being egotistical, I've gained quite a number of watchers since my last journal--I work at the Coyote Ugly Saloon in San Antonio. No we were not the first, and no the movie wasn't filmed here. It was filmed on a sound stage, where else?

I was working a day shift with Brandee

And she was taking a smoke break near me when I busted out with a two-liter of orange soda.

"Who loves orange soda?"
"Kel loves orange soda!"
"Is it true?"
"I do, I do, I do-ooo."

I busted out with some Sweet & Low, and she said I was "so weird". She then asked me for some before I "ruined it", whatever that means. :lol:

So while pouring her some, I explained everything I've just said about the college games.

And Brandee said, "So do it."


"You heard me. So do it."

A challenge. :lol: Well, I couldn't say no... so I narrated as I set it up... And I did it. And it's been so long, I lasted only seven seconds before I ended up gagging into a trash can. TT__TT

And Brandee said I made her week. :P


The down-side, something I'd forgotten about because it's been so long? The 2-hour post-nasal drip associated with the irritation of the nasal passages from the massive amount of soda shoved through them.

The up-side? It was orange-flavored. :3

Samantha Spade?

On haggleman's advice that I pick up the first season of Veronica Mars (and his verbose infatuation with its star, Kristen Bell), I have done just that and must admit I now suffer the exact same affliction as haggleman.

While I didn't at first understand his Kristen craze, despite the number of image links he sent me over MSN, I picked up Season One used at a music store and haven't looked back.

The reason I didn't initially fall header over footer in love as he did is because, for whatever reason, Kristen Bell is one of those rare people who, while she translates extremely well to the medium of still photo, does not translate completely. Her magic lies in her charisma and talent, two qualities that simply refuse to be captured sans mouvement.

So now I have fallen for her as well. And the show is brilliant. The writing, the casting, the twists and turns.

Buy it.

EXACTLY Like in the Movies

So was doing some laundry the other day. My apartment complex has public machines which, thanks to me choosing to live in an efficiency, I am a patron of. My laundry was dry and I went to pick it up.

On the way back to my apartment, a funny thing happened.

|                X---------------------------| My Apt |----
|                  |
|                  |
|                  |
|                  |                  Building
|                  |
|                  |

Likin' my ASCII skillz?

Because our complex has multiple elevations, there are multiple "street levels". Regardless, the laundry facilities are down the stairs on the lower street level. I live on the upper street level.

In retrieving my laundry, I came up the stairs (you reach the top facing north--consult professional map) and hung a left (turned west) and walked a ways. I noticed a pretty attractive girl standing at what would be the western-most edge of my map. By herself. About my age. And she was cute. :P

But as it was, I was carrying laundry and holding my very baggy shorts up with a laundry hand while trying to suck it in for her...

I turned another left (south) and walked to my apartment. Shuffled the laundry around in my arms so I could open the door without dropping my Monopoly boxers, and I paused.... And I looked North, and there was the girl peeking around the corner watching me (see the X on the map).

Like this:

But, you know, my age.

I thought that was cute. :3 She was so busted. Went back out there 30 seconds later but she was gone. :<

Why She's So Awesome

Bianca really is one of my favorite people. The girl has the self-esteem of a whipping boy, but she has a heart of gold.

So a few weeks ago, I got to work early on a day shift, and I put on some music to help wake me up.

And it was Avenue Q. I'll admit this is not the best morning music, but I played it because it was happy and frolicky and that rubs off and wakes me up.

Amy--god love her and so do I--had apparently not had a good night the night before. And after "suffering" through Avenue Q for a minute or so, she asked me, "Really?"

I turned it down, assuming she would go back to her makeup, but she didn't.

"Is that better?"

And she just shook her head. :| So I said 'whatever' and just turned it off, at which point she resumed applying her makeup.

And this set me off simply because of the way she had approached the situation. All she had to do was ask, but instead she copped an attitude that really set me off. I love her to death, and she's hardly the first to scoff at any music played that's not Top40 mainstream, but she didn't even politely ask, nevermind "suffer" through the music like I suffer through so many of the bartenders' things.

That really set me off, enough so (I'm not good at hiding when I'm upset) that she casually mentioned to me while I was walking by at some point that I could turn it back on "if I wanted to", to which I replied that I was good.

I left it at that. Went to bag some trash cans so she wouldn't try and make me listen to it. I didn't want to anymore.

Well, while bagging trash cans, Bianca walked by and said, "Well, I thought it was funny..."


And my day was okay. I was still mad at Amy, but that made everything better. :P

And then 4 days later, I worked another morning shift, right?

I played an old CD I hadn't played in 3 years or so. Full of John Williams. A.I., Jurassic Park, Band of Brothers, E.T. and some miscellaneous non-Williams such as the theme from Dragonheart.

Well, the CD was playing while I was setting up and it was in the middle of playing "Return to Neverland" from the Hook soundtrack, starring the incredible Robin Williams, Dennis Hoffman, and Julia Roberts.

And Bianca walked in... stopped in her tracks... and recognized it immediately.

"Is this... Hook?" :lol:

I was so proud of her. Talked about that movie all day and about how neither of us has seen it in forever and about how she hated me because now she was going to have to get it again. :P I can hear the song in my head right now.

Why I love Spielberg and Williams:…

So yeah, she's awesome.

Kids These Days...

I submitted a request to be allowed to submit film here on dA. I've finally compiled the hours and hours of video from the #dAPensioners San Francisco meet and worked them into a passable slideshow. :P

I don't see why it wouldn't be accepted. A few weeks ago, in anticipation of me submitting my own, I perused the devMeet category of the Film section and was disappointed to see how bare it was. Two films. That's it. And one of them I wouldn't even consider it a devMeet video because these two kids sat in a bed the entire video and smooched each other between the barely audible whispering. :roll:

Well, the category's empty now... so maybe if/when mine gets posted, it'll encourage and inspire others to do the same. :P

And when I do, it'll be better quality, I promise.

And now your moment of zen:…

  • Listening to: Disco--what else?
  • Reading: Underworld -- Graham Hancock
  • Watching: Veronica Mars: Season One
  • Playing: Adobe Premiere, cuz it's fun. :3
  • Eating: Pasghetti
  • Drinking: Pepsi and Gatorade. Both with Sweet &amp; Low

Your Mom Goes to Howl At the Moon

Journal Entry: Tue May 6, 2008, 3:52 AM

Kids is Crazy

So things have been crazy as of late, as some might have guessed by the 2-month gap between last journal and this one. This one, as all of mine, will be inordinately long but this is due to it being my M.O. and not because it's been a while, as Aaron Lewis once so eloquently put it.

As of this very second, I have two Mexicans I've never met or talked to before in my apartment, taking DVDs and clothes and important personal papers. Here in Texas, we believe in equality and expression through diversity, so much so that it would be wrong of me as an American to stop them from lifting these objects. Who am I to stand in the way of urban expression? D:

Not me.

No, but seriously, there're two nice people here from the Army, packing up some stuff to send it off to my sister. She's in New York, stationed at... Fort Somethingorother and I picked up some of her stuff from her storage unit down here in Texas so that the military could come and ship it up to her. I think they do it for free. :shrug:

Felt bad because my boy Jay just moved into the complex:

And he came by the other day and the place was a mess. It was partly a mess because it's been hectic lately and I haven't had much opportunity to clean, but also because there's a substantial amount of space occupied by my sister's stuff. That and my father, in an effort to clean out his garage, offered me three PC towers for free. And a keyboard, old 5-pin mouse, and a monitor. And of course I couldn't pass those up. Especially since he included an original copy of Windows 95 and a shit-ton of software designed to work on Windows 95. :lol: So now I have a tower to run old software on, since running old software on XP and such can sometimes produce gameplay problems, emulators or not.

Mentioned casually to my dad I might network some together so I could install a DBMS architecture and some good old fashioned Linux and get me some hands-on experience with them so I might further my technology skills. It was interesting to note that, at that point, though he said nothing, his "vibe" changed. When I finished speaking, I re-recognized the vibe as "waiting to speak". He's been in Iraq so long I'd forgotten how to label his vibes. Regardless, he informed me something about my "Uncle" Hugh from Australia having to do with Linux. Sure enough, some sleuthing returns this:…

Thought that was interesting. I wonder who else I know on Wikipedia.

Almost forgot about Haley Scarnato:

We aren't BFFs, but I mixed sound for her back when we both worked at Six Flags. Professional relationship works, right? Lol, "works". Literally.

Regardless, I'm not trying to name-drop--I just think it's interesting to find out who one knows on wikipedia. Because then you know non-sourceable things. :eyes: Such as that time a certain someone did a handstand in the green room hallway and another someone named Paul caught that first someone's ankles in the air and stuffed his face in that someone's crotch. :|

Another someone close to me should have her own Wikipedia article, soon. Shoot, I might be the one to start it.

My good friend and fellow Coyote, Brandee.

She was asked to join the newly-formed "Singing Coyotes" music group formed by Coyote Ugly founder, Liliana Lovell. The site has some clips of their first singles. It'll be interesting for when they go on tour.

Mah Brandee:

(C) Coyote Ugly Saloon

Which reminds me... :lol:

Brandee and I were idly standing in the ice room/well at work--she was taking a smoke break, I was just chilling. And she begins to relating to me how she received the suggestion of googling herself from a friend. This is not in itself an unusual thing to do. Once I googled friends and found a man with the same name as my friend, but the man was on google's search results for saving someone from a burning building. Jokes of someone living my friend's life for him abounded.

Regardless, Brandee's search returned results, one of which was one of my previous journals. :lmao: She told me she was all, "Who the fuck is this?!" until she found out it was me. :P Said Journal Entry.

So this is me giving a shout-out to her. She said she liked my style of writing, so I think it's safe to assume she might read this sometime in the future... Guess I'll have to stop posting those lengthy conversations I have with security about how we'd all like to "flip her cup". :paranoid:


So that's what I told my dad when he gave me the computers. No, but really--for those who forgot where I left off, this all began with my dad giving me computer equipment and how it continues to occupy floorspace, and my chagrin at its size.

So those towers take up a definitive amount of space. As does the scanner my father also gave me and the box of cables, software, and miscellaneous items (such as a working 51/4-inch floppy drive. :lol: Yes, two of the towers already have working 51/4-inch floppy drives installed, one going so far as to also have a 31/2 as well. :w00t: Classic.

You know you're not from the current generation of kids because you remember the specific mechanical grind of a floppy being written to. That's right, kids--when I was your age, disk drives made noise. D: 31/2-inch drives hold *gasp* 1.4 Mb. :|

That's an extremely low-quality song. Extremely low-quality.

Like, Paris Hilton low.

Times is Crazy

So anyways I got back from the movies the other day and when I got back home, I saw a familiar shape on the upstairs balcony. After a triple-take, I realized it was Jay, chillin' by himself, smokin'. Said hey (since this was the first time I'd seen him since his move-in, last saturday), went up. Bullshitted. Showed me his apartment. Said as soon as he got his PS3 back from the pawn shop (didn't NEED to pawn it to pay first month's rent+deposit, but said he wanted to just to make sure) we would play us some gamez. Saw his DVD collection and I asked if he needed to borrow a DVD player til he got his PS3 back. He said yeah. Went down to my place (I'm 111, he's 210--he's above me and one over) and he met my place. He said it... was a couple things.

(1) He said my apartment was just like he imagined it. Just like it. Considering the unusual surplus of computers and my sister's bags of clothes, I didn't know if that was a good thing or not.

(2) He put my initial quandary to mind by saying that he loved my apartment. Made some "jokes" about stopping by often. :P

(3) Said he wanted to make his just like mine. I have beer/liquor merch on my walls. My "bedside table" is two computer towers with a surplus of Encyclopedia Britannicas between and on top of them to form a solid base, and then a tin Coors Light sign placed on top. :lmao: Ghetto much? But he said it was clever and original, so I'll go with it. :lol:

Anyways, let him borrow my PS2 (my puter plays DVDs) and some DVDs of mine. Borrow some of his. Still haven't watched them yet. Ever notice how when ANY two people talk about DVDs, someone will always ALWAYS utter the obligatory, "What? You haven't seen insert-title-here?!" D: As flabbergasted as if you haven't ever heard of the Bible. :roll::P I think it's an inate human trait. Something tells me you could be in Steven-fuckin'-Spielberg's house and he could press his secret button to reveal his larger-than-any-video-rental-store-you-can-imagine DVD cache and walk you through and pull out a movie you've never seen just so he can get that look on his face:


The classic ohnoes face. :ohnoes: "You've never seen such-and-such?!"

And you know what? You have every right to take Mr. Spielberg to your measly PBS-friendly DVD selection and return the flabbergastedishness with, "What, Mr. Spielberg? You haven't seen the ridiculous sci-fi movie "Land of the Spiders with a very early William Shatner?!" :ohnoes: "But... that's, like, the greatest movie of all time!"

You would be a tool for saying something like that to Spielberg, but you could still say it. :P

Star Wars Geeks is Crazy

Was walking Candace--a newer waitress--to her car a few weeks ago, and the cellphone went off of some tall lanky guy right as he was passing us. It was the Imperial Theme from Star Wars. :| Candace basically facepalmed as much as possible without actually doing the motion. :no: I actually facepalmed right there in downtown San Antonio. commerce @ Losoya St.

Hot Ladies is Crazy

Was beginning to get a bit down because I hadn't been hit on by any female customers in a while when the next night, that's exactly what happened. :thumb8141183:

First was this lady (I say lady because she was a very, VERY cute late-30s, early-40s. Like, go-go-Gadget-prostate 30s. She motioned to catch my attention and, once she had it, said very silkily, "Why aren't you on the bar?" To which I quite eloquently, with utmost finesse and dictation, replied, "Uh..."

The goofy smile I'm sure was the icing on the proverbial cake. :iconroyalfacepalmplz:

That didn't seem to deter her, though. Her friend was making some faces and vibes along the lines of, "But he's half your age", but her friend didn't seem to be receiving them. I made some comments about unfortunate rules and me not having the required equipment... and of course, in retrospect, I would have said something completely different. I have a response prepared for next time. :P She was cute, but I (purposefully) didn't stick with the conversation. Regrettably, I was a tad behind and needed to catch up.

Girl 2 caught me right at closing. I was washing dishes in a hurry to knock out as many as possible before the roach lights came on (read: fluorescents, so named because they're obnoxiously bright) when this girl right across from me asked me out of nowhere, "Why are you so quiet?"

Despite the length of my journals, I do get asked this question quite a lot. I used to be EXTREMELY quiet.

"I'm sittin' in the window of a street cafe
Watchin' you walking by each day,
It seems that you always wanna look my way
Hey, you can't deny, boy,
You're such a shy boy."

And while it's been a progressive thing for almost a decade now, working at Coyote has really sped up my emergence from my proverbial cake. I mean, shell.

Coming out of a cake is something. :paranoid:

So I explained to the girl that I was just "focusing". Multi-tasking, and such. She asked what I meant by that so I gave a quick synopsis of my barback duties. In the middle of my duties, the roach lights came on. :ohmygod:

Roach lights signal 2:00 AM. Most often, ALL of the bartenders get on the bar to do one last dance for the evening and I get the chance to grab up as much of my stuff from behind the bar as I can while they're all on the bar (a.k.a. out of the way). I got the girl's name, Mari (which is, coincidentally enough, the name of one of the bartenders), but I was going back and forth grabbing limes and mats and glasses. On one of my return trips, she was gone. :<

Sorry, Mari.

Here's hoping you got some action that night, wherever you are now.

And in looking for a "toast" emote, I found this:


Bullshit. Toast could so pwn Batman.

Parents is Crazy

Went to do a bankdrop with the GM the other day and her dad called her on her cell on the way there. As we were pulling into the bank parking lot, she made some parting to her dad and hung up. I don't remember exactly what
she said, but it prompted me to ask if her dad ever had any nicknames for her, and she said yes.

Her: "Sugar Booger"

Me: "So can I call yo--'?"

Her: "No."


Humans is Crazy

Srs part. If you're not into serious introspective parts, you can skip to the next chapter. To sum up this chapter: Colonel Mustard in the library with the Mariah Carey album.

I've only recently come to realize something within the last year: people, more specifically adults, have very poor follow-through. They're incredibly bad at doing what they say they'll do. I'm not separating myself from this, there are of course things I forget to do, things I procrastinate on, but not to the extent I've seen in the last year or so. And it's over such a wide variety or areas, too. Everything of course relates to events and appointments, since that's really the only area where this could be applied, but regardless.

People saying they will do things, and never following through. Even after multiple reminders and suggestions. There just reaches a point where one gives up. Where each successive reminder is made with less sincerity than the last because I feel more and more with each time the inevitability that it's not going to happen.

I can't help but wonder why, but I have a feeling the reasons depend on the individual person and situation. To reduce something as inately complex as motivation to a 0 and a 1 isn't even worth pondering, much less trying.

I was dwelling on this the other day and wondered if it applied to non-Adults as well. At first, generalist cynicism shouted out, "Of course kids do, they're human, too!" But I've been thinking about it and I think the lack of follow-through on a person's part is directly dependent on just how much they have to "follow through" on. Kids can have bad follow-through when it comes to things like cleaning their room or doing homework, but overall they don't have to worry about follow-through because they don't have much to follow through other than getting to base before getting tagged.

So... fresh idea here. Maybe adults' lack of follow-through is a passive-aggressive way of not dealing? Well, I knew that. It's not uncommon for people to agree to do something when they have no intention of doing it, but what about when the person not following through is the one who suggested it? What about, when they're reminded, they once more go on about it for a good hour because they genuinely want to see it happen? :confused:

See why I'm confused?

I have pretty clear suspicions about why certain people haven't followed through with certain things, judging by their Hayden Christensen-like attempts to hide that their entire body language has shifted around me. That's a reference to bad acting for those who didn't catch it.

More bad acting:…

Words is Crazy

I find it interesting that "tell me about it" means exactly the opposite. When someone says "tell me about it", they're actually saying, "I know exactly how you feel". While it's not (usually) said with the intention of ending a conversation, that's what it does. If you and I are in a nerd gathering and I say that I feel the Systech Aural Blaster is a greatly underrated weapon, and you say "tell me about it", then there's no need for me to say anymore. In fact, you stating for you to "tell me about it" is usually where the role of speaker gets transferred. :confused:

People are retarded.

Mexicans is Crazy

I'd made a note to recount something specific to Bianca...

But I don't remember what it was I was going to say because it was quite a while ago... :paranoid:

I know that I worked with her a few weeks ago. Was awesome. Lots of time to talk about things. :3

Let's see. She was downstairs at the host stand. Kept her company for a while. Talked about everything from Tomb Raider (which she absolutely loves) to how neither of us can understand Hardcore/Screamo. :lol:

She's so awesome.

Finales is Crazy

It's not a Schwarzenegger finale, but it's an ending nonetheless.

Went out after work with:

(img reposted because I like it)

Amy (left)


We went to a place down here called Howl At the Moon. It's a franchise so the one near you might be the same idea: dueling pianos. Regardless, it was hella fun.

Rosie got completely trashed halfway through the night. Disappeared for about 20 minutes. And just when we started asking, "Where the hell is Rosie?" she was led back to our table by a bouncer. Apparently she'd spent the last 20 minutes talking to the female bathroom attendant. :lmao:

Some guy she knows came and picked her up. It was Amy, Brandee, and me. Much hilarity mixed with much heart-felt connecting ensued, none of the latter of which I'll repeat here since it's personal.

The former?

Let's just say it wasn't too long before Amy bought a stuffed snake for her boyfriend, about 3 feet (1 meter) long. And it wasn't long after THAT before the snake started seducing my right nipple with its tongue. :|

So yes, it was a good night.

And as soon as lemontea gets his ID from the state (:paranoid:), he can come too. And chinaroses when she stops by during her road trip. And haggleman when he visits in a few months. D:

Unless haggleman starts trying to seduce my nipple as well, in which case we'll have a problem. :|

Cellphone Pics is Crazy

Some miscellaneous pictures I've had on my phone for a while now. Just finally got them off of it.

My step sister asleep in the back of the bug. Priceless.

Lost In Translation 1

Lost In Translation 2

Lost In Translation 3

Those bagpipers some of you may have rememberd
me mentioning previously... Showed up Coyote Ugly
out of nowhere...

Actual manager's log from when the bar first opened. :lmao:


My lodge: Alamo Lodge #44

Lyndsay, back before she moved to Minnesota. :P

Leonora. :3

Some giant sushi display up on Houston Street. :lmao:
It's huge.

To conclude, I leave you with the info that I've found my doppleganger. This is something that involves a lot of detail and links and pics and videos, so I'll save it for next time because this journal is already no doubt tl;dr as it is. Though I hope it's not actually "tl;dr" because I'm told my journals are very entertaining by many people. Either way, suspense.

Just know that, upon viewing one of the videos, my mom exclaimed "omg". :| It looks that much like me.

Next time.

I could be a Jeremy... :paranoid:

  • Listening to: Vanessa Carlton
  • Reading: Underworld -- Graham Hancock
  • Watching: Buffy the Vampire Slayer: S6
  • Playing: Thief 2: The Metal Age
  • Eating: Cold pizza :3
  • Drinking: Dr. Pepper

Your Mom Goes to My Photoshoots

Journal Entry: Sun Mar 23, 2008, 4:19 PM

It's Not Easy Being Green

Usually, my little section headings have a predetermined relevance to their accordant sections, but for now I just chose this because that's the song that's playing. :3


It's finally taken me a few months, but I've really "for real" settled into the new apartment.

Had some minor wannabe-drama few weeks back--resolved now. Life's good.

Finally getting back into writing. Unsure of where to pick up again, I picked and sorted through all my backed up in-progress writing to find something that snatched my attention. Found something.

Slight Digression

So I got up day before yesterday. Showered. Got dressed. Checked dA. Went to work. I was scheduled to work a 9 o'clock shift. I got to work. Said "what's up" to the river door security. Made my way through the crowd. As I reached the front door, the Manager-On-Duty for the night, Richard, gave me this weird look.

I knew it as soon as he asked. "What're you doing here?"

"I'm the 9 o'clock."

"What's today?"


The other barback for the night came down the stairs right at that moment. Richard stopped him real quick, "Dre, what day is today."


TT__TT Big me.

So I shrugged it off. Said general departings to everyone, said hi and bye to my girls.

I was walking back to a point where I could catch a bus back to my apartment when I suddenly came over all peckish... :eyes:

I resolved to attend some place I'd never been before, especially since San Antonio is replete with quite a number of awesome places you've never heard of no matter how long you've lived in the city. :P

First one I saw was Swig, a martini bar.

Walked in. It was nice. Dimly lit. Trendy people sprinkled throughout the establishment, having a good time. Idly snooped around and very quickly found a table with a plug under it. Hooked up the ol' laptop and external harddrive.

A cute waitress named Molly came by and gave me a menu and introduced herself. I asked if they served food, to which she replied they didn't, but I waved it off. I had a good feel about the place so I chose to hang out. She gave me time to look at the menu and I rested on a "Soprano martini". Skyy vodka, Tuaca (Italian liqueur), amaretto, and pineapple juice. I noticed in my peripheral attention that a skinny white guy had passed me while Molly was taking my order. As soon as she left with my order, he came back and introduced himself: David, the manager.

Nice to meet you, David. :P We made small talk for about 10 seconds about the Riverwalk and business and stuff, and then he wished me a good night...

And when Molly brought my drink, she informed me that it was on the house. :3

I love this town.

Hung out for about an hour or so, knocking quite a few pages into the script I chose (the whole point of this digression).

During the course of my pounding away on the keyboard, I suddenly heard, "Ah, you can't be looking at porn in public." :lol:

I looked up and, who did I see? :slow: No one I knew. I've never seen this girl before in my life. She was this kee-yoot blond girl in this slender black dress. That was all she said, too. :P Smugly holding her martini glass, she continued on past me. Never saw her again the rest of the time I was there.

Place started to fill up a bit as time went on, and a piece of a conversation lilted over to me and I very distinctly heard this young-30s guy say to his friend, "Yeah, internet is amazing."

I wasn't ON the internet at that time, but I felt like standing up and shouting "hallelujah" or something, just to fuck with him. :P

Finished my first Soprano. Had another.

Was still feeling quite peckish so I curtailed my literary activities and infiltrated a place of food stuffz down the street known as Ticket. Part of my interest in going to this particular sports pub was (1) because I knew they had wings and pizza (and that's all) and (2) because I knew it was a frequent hangout of people I work with and it would be cool to happen to see someone.

Went in, found another table near a plug, set up and, as my computer started up, went to the bar.

Ordered a Blue Moon (thought of welfareleech and gunslinger when I did) and some wings. I was checking out one of the coasters when I heard a "Hey, stranger".

I turned around and it was Dawn:


I hadn't seen her in... 5 months since she quit. Was so good to see her. :3 Very long hug. She gives awesome hugs. Such a cool person--man, I miss her.

Luckily, she informed me that she was no longer working at SoHo, a bar on the northeast side of town, but was now back downtown working at the very close Mad Dog's British Pub. :w00t:

So I'm going to have to start hanging out there.

To TiVo forward, she said she had to go--she was meeting a friend--but I know she's back downtown, making very good money, supposedly, so I know she's not going anywhere.

Night-before-yester-night was a good night.

I Love My Phone

I'm not exactly a genius for figuring it out because it's an intentional built-in feature, but my phone has the ability to transform into a modem. I hook it up to my computer by the USB cable it came with, change the phone to "Modem" mode, run a little program on da lappy, and boom: interwebs.

And the data rate is well high enough for me to chill in #dAmn, as I have done multiple times.

Though I didn't do it the other day, it's kinda fun to be sitting there some place, chilling on the laptop. Somebody finally gets the nerve to lean over, "You on the internet?"


"This place has Wi-Fi?" they ask incredulously.

"Nope," I smile.

Always makes them blankface me. :P

I can get internet anywhere I can get a phone signal, so my internet service actually surpasses any currently implemented Wi-Fi range in the city of San Antonio, since we still don't have city-wide Wi-Fi. :3


I Can't Believe I Forgot

I was laying here racking my brain for what else I was going to put in my journal, and kicked myself forgetting about: the photoshoot! D:

More specifically, the Coyote Ugly San Antonio audition pics for next year's Official Coyote Ugly calender.

Got a text from one of my managers two weeks ago asking if I'd want to shoot the girls.

I say sure. I ask for details but he's kind of vague. Yes, I should bring my lights, it's going to be a "shoot". Oh, and btw, he says, it's going to be a bikini shoot. :|

I get there the day of and no one's there...

But they begin to trickle in.

Lindzi went first because she was seeing Phantom of the Opera that night and had to leave soon.

Brandee. Sherene? I don't remember the order--I didn't choose it. Asal and Crystal in there somewhere. Bianca went last for the night, which was awesome because the GM was supposed to be monitoring the photoshoot (and offering ideas throughout the course of it) so that the pictures wouldn't come out all ho-ish. But for Bianca, Shawna (the GM) was in the office putting makeup on so Bianca and I took the initiative and just started shooting without her, just to mess around. I was glad for this because Bianca, who is very shy, had loosened and opened up enormously by the time Shawna actually came out.

Reviewed the pictures in the office with Shawna and Marsha (one of the Asst. Managers.). They liked them, sang my praises, but I wasn't happy with Lindzi's run, so I asked if it would be possible to do a reshoot, simultaneously voting that I was more than able to if she was up for it. Shawna agreed and said she'd give Lindzi a call.

Got the call later that night when I went to the movies with the ol' maternal figure. Lindzi said she was definitely game. I said I'd be there.

I was the next day. Shot. Came out, as you can all see in my gallery, awesome. The girl could be a millionaire with a body like that.

CHASITY hit me up later that night after Lindzi's reshoot and asked if she could squeeze one in before the day of the deadline, and I said I'd be more than glad. As she explained to me when I asked, she hadn't been feeling well by the time the shoot came around, enough so that the last thing she wanted to do was squeeze into a bikini. Which is completely understandable since her being uncomfortable would come across in the pictures.

We shot, again the results are in the gallery.

Those pictures. :lol: Bianca makes me grin just thinking about them. She has got to be the most adorable person who has ever lived. I'll post some more as time goes on, as I make headway in editing them. I swear, Bianca could be in the middle of throwing up blood and she'd still take a good picture. :no:

Oh... and the connections start coming in, as well.

The DAY of the shoot, one of the old managers Tony says he's going to be bartending at one of the bars he bartends at and asks if I wanna come by. I say why I regretably can't (since I'd really like to, haven't seen the guy in forever) and he says he actually needs a photographer to do some promo headshots. :eyes: And would I like to? Hell yeah.

Btw, just to note, I got paid $100 for the Coyote gig. Not bad starting out, right?

A few days ago, I was sitting in the office on a day shift, talking to Marsha, and the phone rings. She picks it up, talks for a minute, and then hangs up, "When you get a chance, Matt wants you to call him."

Runnin' dis joint? by DJStrife

Matt = the Lenny Kravitz-lookin'
motherfucker on the left. :P

ANOTHER former Asst. Manager. I called him up, and he's looking for a temporarily-free photographer. Apparently he's a promoter now and he's looking for a photographer. He would compensate for travel and business-related expenses of anything I'd need, but he said he wouldn't be able to pay me just yet. That right now he just needs to get the name out and then once things start rolling, he can pay. I know this is a situation where, if it goes bust, I won't get compensated, but it has the potential to be so I'ma go for it. :P It'll be helping him out, and it'll get me experience, so why not? Besides, if the chance goes through where it takes off, I've got yet another hookup. Or at least a stronger one, since the fact that he called me in the first place shows I already have one.

I'm wary, though, because I've come to learn something the hard way over the last 7 or so months: once they find out you have a camera that's more than a simple point-and-shoot, and that you (reasonably) know how to use it, everyone and their dog's mistress will ask you to do a photoshoot.

This is fine, except that the lack of follow through blows my mind. :| I can only assume that this is because everyone, I think, likes the concept of doing a shoot, but has trouble realizing that thought. I have to wonder how many people haven't made good on that request because they're nervous/scared/insecure and just can't bring themselves to admit it.

I don't know--we'll see.

Brandee has had good follow through with other things, so I think she genuinely wants to do one. Karen [see gallery] does as well, though not until two months from now. :lol: Saw her yesterday and all she said was, "Two months." And I'm like, "I know... :3"

So we'll see.

For Those Who Haven't Heard

Dave Grohl, former drummer for Nirvana, current frontman of Foo Fighters and overall sexiest manbeast alive, is running for president. For serious.

He has my vote.

Can he count on yours?

Ojos Asi

I think eyes are amazing. Though not necessarily eyes, but instead the brain function that recognizes eyes.

Humans, it can be argued, recognize eye contact because we grow up labeling them "eyes" in school and then we subconsciously learn through experience that they're a major source of readable body language.

But animals.

For those of you who have pets, such as cats and dogs, you ever find it interesting that they recognize eye contact? They have no perceivable lexiconic means for "labeling" eyes, but they rezognize them apart from the rest of the body. Animals frequently use eyes to display/perceive dominance.

I find it fascinating. :paranoid: Just me, then.

Where the Hell Did THAT Come From?

So I was watching TV a week or so ago and some movie came on some channel, I don't remember the name of either, but it had Alexa Vega in it (of Spykids fame). And she was older...

Wasn't a bad movie. Watched it from start to finish. Well, okay. I liked it. :lol: Made me smile--it was cute.

But anyways, I thought to myself, "Wow, she's older." So I wiki-ed her. And that led to her myspace... :| And wow.

For those of you about my age, you probably remember her as the nerdy Spykid... so imgaine how equally surprised I was when I came across this:…

And more on her myspace if you have one (since you have to log in to view hers). I don't know where that all came from, but damn! :|

And yes, she's legal. :roll:

Just surprised me. And apparently she can sing, having been in Hairspray and now about to appear in "Repo! The Genetic Opera". We'll have to check that out.

All I Have to Say Is:

"Among" is a very weird-sounding word.

Think about it.

About its constituent parts. Especially the "ng" sound.

Weird, right?

Big Finale!!

I realize this is a shorter journal than normal, but this ending makes up for it.

So a couple weeks ago, I went to the movies. I had a day off and wanted to cram a bunch of movies all into one day.

Showed up. First movie was Semi-Pro. I was a bit early but I bought my ticket anyways. Got my soda.

Headed up the elevator (this was at the Alamo Quarry for those who know San Antonio) and got my ticket ripped.

The previous showtime was still playing so I was just going to hang out in front of the door like I do until it let out. But...

As soon as I reached the door area, a guy came out of "Semi Pro".

And as he's about to pass me, he stops.


I blankface.


Now I know, "Um, I'm not Jeremy. Wrong guy."

The guy kinda hesitates like hes processing something, and then his shoulders kinda collapse a bit, he chuckles a bit, and his body language conveys that of someone who is embarrassed and is going to apologize.

:| Instead, he hugs me. "Man, it's been so long since I've seen you! You're back!" Apparently he thought I was joking...

And so I went with it, "I'm back." :P

"How long's it been?"

I personally have no clue how long it's been for this guy and 'Jeremy', "Too long."

"I'll say. What've you been up to, man?"

And so I went with it, "Um, not much, man. Just keepin' busy. You?"

"Oh, I'm just here with the wife. Watchin' 'Semi Pro'."

"Is it good? That's what I'm here to see."

"Yeah, it's good. So, I guess congratulations are in order. Heard you had a kid." Big smile on his part.

(I'm suddenly reminded of a scene in Casanova >_> )

Non-committal smile on my part, and a "Yup". It is at this point I realize I'm on thin ice because this guy might already know the gender of the baby, so, since I DON'T know the gender, I have to be careful not to refer to it. Or how I acquired the baby. "My girl"? "My wife"? What if she's not my wife? What if she's not even my girl? What if this "Jeremy" adopted with his life-partner?

The guy asked me how the baby was and how I was and I said the baby's good. Bluffed something about how I was just here to get some personal time. I said it was good, but it was rough. Apparently this is not the answer a proud parent gives, or maybe this guy saw something I didn't know was there in my face, because he got serious for a minute there, "Everything all right?"

"No, no, I'm good. Just... things. You know. Everything's incredible, but it's always more complicated than you think it's going to be."

He seemed to accept this and moved on. Asked me my number, so I gave him something close to it. Close to it so it would roll off my tongue naturally. Was it potentially wrong to give him a fake number? This guy who was so excited to see Jeremy? Yes... but we all just KNOW that if I'd said I was between phones at the moment, that THAT second my phone would go off. :| And that would hurt the guy's feelings. Gotta consider all angles.

And then the guy said something that got my attention. :| He said he saw me on youtube. All these weeks later, all I've been thinking about is that there's some guy running around on youtube looking like me. The guy clarified that the video was of me "versus Ed". :confused:

I made some general comments of, "Oh shit, no kidding? I'ma have to check that out. Youtube myself."

Mentioned something about his son still talking about me all the time. Still plays with his Brian Kendrick dolls. I googled and Brian Kendrick is apparently some WWE Wrestler, at least that's the only Brian Kendrick I saw that would have a figurine/doll of him.

So I'm thinking I look like some amatuer wrestler? I googled all sorts of variations of "jeremy" and "versus" and "ed", but nothing of anyone who looked like me. Oh, and CJ, too. The guy called me CJ, so I guess the J is "Jeremy". :confused:

And then the guy said he had to go because he really had to go to the bathroom and get back to his wife, but that it was "incredible" seeing me again.

I returned the sentiment.

And then I ducked out of view. The last thing I needed was to be hanging around when the movie let out so the guy's wife could look at me for 3 seconds before exclaiming that I was not Jeremy...

I could be a Jeremy.

But so yeah.

So this happens a lot. :| Not quite for this long, but I get plenty of people who walk up and go, "Dude! Holy shit!" :lol:

And I'm all, "Dude! Who the hell're you!?" :lol:

No, I don't say that. It happens so often (srsly) that I just go with it.

Bout a year ago: Guy comes up to me at Firehouse Pub & Grill, where I worked at the time, "Dude! What happened to the other night after we left Mad Dog's?"

Never seen this guy before in my life... but I went with it, knowing Mad Dogs is, as mentioned above, a British pub on the downtown Riverwalk. Went on for a good five minutes about how some of us just branched off from there. Guy totally bought it.

But seriously, I'm good with faces. Excellent.

As mentioned in a previous journal entry, when I walked by a guy named Eddie that I haven't seen since fourth grade, I recognized him immediately. Didn't recognize me at all.

When a guy I graduated with named Roy walked past me on the street one night, I recognized him immediately. He didn't notice me at all.

When I was at one of the movie theatres a few months ago and I saw another guy I graduated with, named Jacob, I recognized him immediately, even though he's put on at least 50 lbs since 2004. :| He used to be a handsome guy.

The only classes I ever had with these people were elementary-school recess, for Eddie, freshman football, for Roy, and 7th grade English, for Jacob. I spent as much time with these people as they spent with me. :shrug: So when someone I DON'T know comes up out of nowhere under the gross assumption I'm someone I'm not, trust that I don't know them. :P

But I could be a Jeremy... :plotting:

  • Listening to: Foo Fighters / Blink 182
  • Reading: Purgatorio
  • Watching: nothing
  • Playing: miscellaneous Guitar Hero
  • Eating: peanut butter
  • Drinking: organic OJ

Your Mom Goes to FastTrak

Journal Entry: Sat Feb 23, 2008, 9:23 PM

This One's a Doozie...

Mmm, grape juice. This ain't no cheap stuff, either--this is the 100%-natural communion-grade grape juice.

So it's about time I updated this. I had another journal in a stage of completion, but a partition on my drive corrupted all wonky-like and I just reinstalled Ubuntu. All I lost, really, were my Firefox extensions and the journal.

So here I am.

Lol, oh, Hybrid Theory (Linkin Park). Brings back so many memories. I went through a Staind/Linkin Park/Limp Bizkit/Godsmack phase back in early high school where that's all I pretty much listened to, so this music defines a definite section of my life. :P

I remember when this album first came out. Nobody (that I knew) had heard anything like Linkin Park before. A rapping/singing group with excellent songwriting, unafraid to use vocal harmonies. What genre? Rap? Industrial? Alt rock? Metal? Rapcore? Nu-Metal?

Anyways, excuse me while I slide off Mike Sheroda's lap and continue with the journal.

Even When Business Is Slow...

...things still happen.

Was at work last thursday. Day shift. And I... fell down the stairs. :lol: Halfway , to be exact. I knew I would fall one of these days, and I'm the kind of person who always assumes the worst-case scenario--worst-case so rarely ever happens that when it doesn't happen, I'm pleasantly surprised at the fortunate turn of events, and when it DOES happen, I was expecting it all along so I feel psychic. Because I always jump to the worst conclusion, I mentally prepare myself for worst-case scenarios. Anyone else who assumes the worst off-the-bat will concede they do this. You approach stairs and think, "One of these days, I'm gonna bust my ass on these... I hope I remember to fall backwards."

Because if you're walking down stairs and you fall forward, you fall a good 6 feet farther than if you've fallen backwards.

So, I fell backwards when my foot slipped on the edge of the top stair, there being a total of 14 stairs in this flight. I hit my back on the stairs pretty hard, enough so leave a giant red bruise still there after 3 days, and I slid down 3 or 4 stairs, but the two cases of beer I was carrying weren't so lucky. They slid down the stairs like they were on a postal service chute. Luckily only "busted" 7 bottles, but only two of those broke, but the two broke in their case without flying out, so it was relatively easy cleanup.

Even when I fail, I win.

Sadly, not failed in a spot with video cameras. :( I really wanted to see that.

Oh well.

There's a Reason Our Unofficial Theme Song Is...

..."Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry. Whenever someone calls my phone from Coyote Ugly, the personalized ringtone is that song. So applicable.

(Ubuntu's great but the overall volume of my sound card is a lot lower than it was when I ran XP. :paranoid: So instead of only hearing Linkin Park, I have Hank Williams Jr. in the background as well--I'm at work.)

Sent some people on here pics of the day before the Alamo Bowl game. The Pennsylvania State cheerleaders all came and danced on the bar. It was... well, I sent pictures of it to people, so it was a major "nice".

Day before New Years eve, I worked the night shift, right? I showed up earlier, like I do, and was checking things behind the bar, right? Well, the two bartenders that day shift were Amy and Chas.





:lmao: I love those girls. Sweetest girls you've ever met. Amy was pretty reserved when she joined us 5 or so months ago, but we've since corrupted her adequately. We await her final graduation with anticipation. :P

Both Chas and Amy began the New Years celebrations early--both were well intoxicated by the time I got there. Crystal comes behind the bar to count her drawer in for the night shift. Chas is standing on one side of her, I'm on the other. Chas says something to Crystal about 10 shots of Patron in the last 30 minutes. :roll:

I casually chuckled something about not being able to tell, and Chas goes, "What?"

I shrugged.

Chas feels her way around Crystal and comes up next to me, leaning on my shoulder. "What didju say?"

"I said I never would have known."


Somewhere at the other end of the bar, a cricket chirrups.

Chas sways a little.

"Are you being serious?"

"No, Chas, I'm just messing with you."

"Oh..." And then she leans her head on my shoulder, "I love you."


And then she kissed me on the neck and walked off. :P At least she wasn't drunk.

After that, I wandered down to the other end of the bar, right? Amy's there trying to look around the back bar for Fella-knows-what, but she's heavily intoxicated as well, so her search consists of lifting the same tip bucket every couple of seconds to see if whatever she's looking for has suddenly appeared under said bucket.

"Whatchu lookin' for?"

"My... my makeup bag."

"Where was it last?"

"Up here behind... my register."

"You sure it didn't fall behind the register?" So I took the liberty and checked behind her register, but no bag. "Well, what does it look like?"

"Clear plastic... with... blue trim." She turns around and walks down the bar about 5 feet... passing the makeup bag with blue trim in plain sight on the humidor right next to her register. :|

"Um... Amy? Is that it?"

I wish emotes could show the level of surprise/gratitude she had on her face. :lmao:

"Oh! Thank you!" And she came up to me and (exact quote) placed her hands on my shoulders, looked me dead in the eye, and, holding my gaze, said, "You're a genius. A genius!!" And then she turned and left.

Oh, those girls. :no:

So Much For Those Resolutions

The night of New Years eve was something else entirely. :no:

I got there early (like I do)--everyone who didn't work that day or night had been called into help setup decorations and stuff so it was nice to show up and not have to blow up balloons. :hmm:

I was originally going to type more for this section, but now that it's been well over a month and a half since the time, I can say that the night was (in comparison to the rest of the journal) pretty mundane. Well... kind of... :eyes: Things are never truly mundane at Coyote Ugly...

I worked with the day barback Robert, who confided when a certain song came on the jukebox, that he loved Guitar Hero. We talked about that for a while.

zanenkim stopped by and chilled for a bit, making sure to hit on the foxy Malerie. :P

Right about 10:30 pm, though, things began to trainwreck... :hmm: Bad. All of the bartenders overestimated that night (accidentally or otherwise) and achieved various degrees of "fucked up".

A month later, I'm still not sure what was up with Brandee, but she wasn't having a good night from the beginning, evidenced by, when I asked if she was all right, she replied with, "Fuck everyone. I hate people."


5 minutes later, I was standing at the other end of the bar, leaning against the backbar, and Mari was right there.

I said to Mari, "I feel bad for Brandee. I think she's about to kill someone."

Mari, without taking her gaze off the drink she was making, says, "That's good."


Mari poors some ice into another glass. "I want a cheeseburger."

:lmao: Okay, Mari. I'll get right on that.

And then there was Sherene. :no:

I found out later from Lindsay that Sherene had taken what is colloquially called a "big boy" shot, which is three shots of the same liquor. Sherene chose Rumpleminz. :no: So she was fucked up from the get-go. No sooner was she out of the starting gate on-shift then she was gone.

It was at some point on-shift that I was washing dishes, and I noticed Sherene standing in the ice well area about 4 feet away. She was swaying in a way I had previously only seen cartoon characters. :lol: Like, her feet were stationary and she had this lobotmoy-patient look on her face, but her upper torso was gyrating like... well, a gyroscope. It was interesting. It was so comical, I honestly thought she was just joking at first. The longer she did it, though, the more convinced I was she wasn't kidding. I left behind the bar to go find her a stool so she could sit in the ice well area, and I was gone for 10 SECONDS!! I came back and she was gone. :ohmygod: I told the manager who just happened to come out from behind the bar, and he went looking for her.

Long story not-so-long, she's on an indefinite drinking ban while on the clock. :P

And then the upstairs bartender, Karen, got smashed as well. I won't really go into it too much, but the GM partied here that night, too, and she was still in after the doors closed... and when I left the upstairs bar at one points after closing, the GM and Karen were casually teasing each other about who talked more behind the other's back. Well, apparently not more than 30 minutes later, they erupted into a full verbal fight. :roll: Whatever.

Oh, and Brandee coughed in the head-of-security's face, so he pushed her face away hard with his hand. She started ranting and raving about him slapping her... :shrug: They were both wrong. She was drunk, and he's an asshole, no offense to him. People who pump 'roids generally let aggression get the best of them.

Best part of New Years?

Well, the theme was roaring 20s, or something along those lines. Capone meets Great Gatsby. :roll:

So after everything's done and closed, I'm upstairs with Karen (after the fight) and we're chilling, talking. And... I don't know how, but next thing I know, we're talking about "the sweet spot". On guys. :paranoid: And how to access it through oral... excursions. Only at Coyote. She thought she knew what I was talking, but it turned out she didn't. "No," I explained, "that's a helper spot, but it's not THE spot. THE spot is the frenulum."

Karen's other job is a teaching job, but as a speech teacher, so her male anatomy was a bit vague. So... she persuaded me to look up a picture of male gonads on my internet-capable phone so I could show her just what I was talking about. And I did. :no: She was surprised to learn the frenulum was basically the male clit. All focus there. "Which is why," I explained to Karen, "certain hand motions during oral are not only ineffective, but kind of annoying as well. For me, at least."

"But my boyfriend likes them. I think I give good head." So of course she has to make sure, so she calls her boyfriend up at 3 in the morning, "Do I give good head?"

lmao :no: Kids these days.

But so yeah. The upside to that entire convo with Karen is that I got to yoink her fedora. :P I still gots it. Mine now.

Ozzy Was Here

Woke up about 8 am on the 12th of January having a very hard time breathing. In truth, it wasn't the difficulty breathing that woke me up, but the wheezing of my lungs. It was so loud it woke me.

None of my backup inhalers worked because they're all pretty-much empty.

The medicine that works the best is Advair, but I was out long ago. So... I decided to finally go see my old pulmonologist, Dr. Orozco (yes, he's Hispanic), so I did the best I could breathing-wise for the 30 or so minutes it took to ride/walk to where I remembered his office to be in the Rosa Verde Towers across from Santa Rosa Hospital here in downtown San Antonio. My mom used to work at Santa Rosa as an ER nurse so I knew the area enough to find it. It's downtown so, really, the hospital's a 10 minutes walk from my work.

Walked into the Rosa Verde Towers at some early hour and checked the directory... but his name wasn't there. :|

I googled him on my phone and, with my mad skillz, I found a listing for his old office floor and number. I took the elevator, praying all the while, and... there's a sign on the door that he's moved to a business district here in San Antonio termed the "Medical Center" because it has about 3 or so hospitals all across the street from each other. This center is also more than an hour away by busride.

So... after some deliberation, I went across the street to Santa Rosa. My first time ever going to an emergency room on my own. To  be honest I was momentarily unsure of where exactly to go because, when my mom would take my sister and I, we always went in through the back entrance where the paramedics go through. I figured this would be a breach in protocol, though, so I wound my way to the waiting room.

Filled out a very small form, no medical history. Only TV in the waiting room had That's So Raven on. :shrug:

Got called back where a nurse asked me some questions: why I was there, what was wrong, how long, etcetera. He said he was an asthmatic so he seemed to know what I was talking about, moreso than if he hadn't been. Pulse and stuff. Said if things got worse while I was in the waiting room, I could call on him and he would answer... :sing: "If I should fall, he'll pick me up."


So I was officially "admitted" at 10:07. 4 or so other people in the waiting room. When I came back out into the waiting room after being admitted, I noticed... joy of joys! :wow:

Hannah Montana was on!! :excited:

There I am, 10 in the morning, sitting in an emergency room, trying not to laugh. Trying not to laugh not because I was having trouble breathing, but because I would have been the only one in the waiting room laughing. :paranoid: I love that show.

And then Suite Life of Zach and Cody came on. Funny. After it ended, though, this rather large, rather dirty guy 6 chairs over got up and started changing the channel. He was wearing black Crocs, but he was one of those large-enough people that should never wear Crocs... ever. :hmm:

And he changes channels for about 2 minutes... and finally rests on sport fishing. :|

He stands there with his hand on the side of the TV (no remote) watching fishing. I give him two minutes before I say, "Sir, can you change the channel, please?"

"I can put it back on Disney, if you'd like," he replies very discourteously.

"As long as it has a plot, I don't care."

So he changed some more and rested on ABC family. Home Makeover. Good, I like that show.

Called back at 11 am.

Was put in a bed in what's called "Fast Track". To be honest, that's what I was waiting for. The nurse had told me Fast Track opened at 11 and when that hit, I'd be out of there. Fast Track is exactly what it sounds like: speed nursing. :P They wear rollerskates and everything. No, but really, the Nurse Practitioner came in and checked me out. I answered questions. And then she said, "Let's listen to your back." Her stethoscope wasn't on my back for more than two seconds before she said, "So I'm going to get that breathing treatment."

That bad, huh, lady? :lol:

She came back with the equipment, an O2 tank, and the medicine, and, let me tell you... that breathing treatment was wonderful...

Better than mediocre sex with a girl who doesn't really know what she's doing and so expects you to do everything. Actually, a lot of things are better than that. Better than... I don't know. Why do I have to do all the work? Imagine something "pretty" awesome--the breathing treatment was better than that.

While getting my breathing treatment, though, I overheard why it took so long for me to get admitted, why I had to wait for fast track: they were on diversion. :ohmygod: Of course.

For the sake of those whose parent(s) was/were not nurses/doctors, I'll explain diversion, real quick. Consider it educational. It's an interesting insight into the politics of the medical industry, since one wouldn't initially think there to be any politics there.

When a hospital (here in the United States, at least) runs out of beds to put patients in, they (usually the charge nurse) phone-in to the dispatching service that services the city (in this case, San Antonio) and places his/her hospital on "diversion", which basically says, "Don't send paramedics here, we don't have room." When a hospital goes on Diversion, they don't legally have to accept patients unless the patients are in full arrest, which is a good thing because anyone in full arrest needs a hospital, any hospital as soon as possible.

The politics come in that, for whatever reason, each hospital has its own monitor it can pull up that shows the Diversion status of other hospitals in the city. An interesting (and necessary) feature of Diversion is that if everyone in the city goes on Diversion, everyone instantly gets knocked off Diversion. So... if Santa Rosa, South East Baptist, University Hospital, et al. all go on Diversion because they genuinely have no beds, and North East Baptist is the only hospital in the city not on Diversion, they can be dicks and go on Diversion (whether they have beds or not) simply because it forces all of the other hospitals off of Diversion right then and there.

Dick move, huh? :lol:

So anyways, Santa Rosa was on Diversion. ER was full. Med/Surg, ICU, and Telemetry (colloquially just called Tele) all full.

Anyways, long story not-so-long, the Nurse Practitioner gave me some scripts for a new Albuterol derivative since she said the old one was removed from the market, and for "Pulmacort", a daily asthma medicine she said was cheaper than Advair (since Advair, dosage 250/50, costs about $200 without insurance) but just as good.

Said thank you. Left. Waiting room was JAM packed. Felt very sorry for everyone because they didn't know the hospital was on Diversion and so would be waiting for a long time. Now you see why you sometimes wait 9 hours when you go to the waiting room (I've heard stories, I haven't experienced that myself): because there are no beds.

3 buses later, I was on San Pedro Avenue at a Camera store. Bought a new battery charger for my Rebel XT for $54. :no:

Did the pharmacy thing at the Central Market here on Broadway, right down the road from where I live... and I ask the pharmacist what they'll cost. The Albuterol sulfate will cost about $34, which is fine... but the Pulmacort, without insurance, is about $190. :| So much for cheaper. I just got the Albuterol. I still have the scrip for the Advair, but I don't know that I'll get it.

I feel sorry for you smokers. Don't worry, someday you can share in my not-being-able-to-breath, too. Granted, you'll have purposefully driven yourself to a point I was born at, which is pretty fuckin' retarded, but then at least we can suffer together. :aww:

Eddie Murphy Had It Easy

One of the former bouncers from Coyote Ugly came back to visit me a few weeks ago, man by the name of Mac. Big bald white guy. One of those guys who loves to laugh, but can whip out the Eddie Griffin "whip-eye" in a second.

We went and got some chow one night after I got off, and he was recounting some of his stories about his current workplace, a "correctional facility" (read: jail) in Texas, south of San Antonio. He of course had a lot of stories about the "close familial ties" (read: favoritism) of some of the guards.

One of his stories was of an inmate he'd gotten to know a bit over the last year or so.

This Mexican guy who had paid $2000 to come to America, right? (That's where the Eddie Murphy joke comes in, for those who missed it.) What does $2000 get you? It gets you a box so small, you can't stretch out in it. You lay down in it in the fetal position. This box is then put in the bed of a gravel-transporting truck along with 30 other person-stuffed boxes, all stacked on each other. The boxes are then covered with gravel, and the truck is driven through the border up into the United States from Mexico. In this case, into Texas.

Well, for whatever reason, the driver didn't see fit to put a tarp over the bed of the truck. Throw in that it started raining, and that the truck had an accident in which the driver ran off, and you can understand how the bed of the truck began to fill up with water. Not all the way--a little less than half of the illegal immigrants managed to make it out alive, but the others drowned in a wooden box, stuck under a ton and a half of gravel.

Those that made it out alive only did so because they were found by police when the abandoned truck was called in.

And now the guy is in jail, awaiting extradition back to Mexico.

Say what you want about the US--it may not be Paradise, but it can't be that bad of a place if everyone and their mother are trying to get here.  

Oh, and the guy lost $2000, too.

It's Not Unpossible! D:

There's a bar right down the road from Coyote Ugly called "Club Sirius". I went in however-many-months-ago because one of my customers works there, and checked it out. And I noticed... that they have a "Shot Challenge". The "Club Sirius Shot Challenge", nonetheless.

You have at least one of each shot from this giant 100-shot menu board on the wall, and when you finish the challenge, you get a t-shirt saying you completed the challenge, and you get your name on a plaque on one of the stool-chairs. I'm about 1/4 of the way through.

I was looking at the list a while ago, and (you can do the shots in whatever order you want) I figured I'm going to save a certain shot for last. I'm going to save it, one, because of its literal significance. It's called: "The Last Shot At the Alamo". This would be a handy shot to have as my last one because it would quite literally be my "last shot" of the list. And since the Alamo itself is right down the road (I could run to it from the bar, touch it, and be back to the bar in under two minutes), it would be even more appropriate.

I also want to save it for last because it's the nastiest-sounding shot on the list. It's, I was looking at it--the menu board has the ingredients of each shot next to the name--essentially a 4 horsemen (Jim Beam, Jack Daniels, Johnnie Walker, and Jose Cuervo) with Jager and 151. :|

In short, it's the shot from hell.

We'll see.

Coyote Quotes

If you've made it this far, I congratulate you. You will now be rewarded with my favorite part of every journal: quotes from Coyote Ugly. All of these quotes are 100% real, written down verbatim moments after they were said, brought to you by Coca-Cola.


Lindsay: "My hair smells like limes."


Brandee: "That Spicy McChicken sandwich I ate earlier? I'd completely forgotten about it until now. I'm all, 'Oh! My ass hurts'!"


Lindsay: "Me and that donkey go way back."


Jenn: "Finally get to have a real beer."

Me: "A what?"

Jenn: "A real beer."

Me: "Oh, I thought you said 'beard'."

Jenn: "That too."

Me: "I was gonna say, I haven't seen too many females with razor burn and I aim to keep it that way."

Jenn: "Depends where the razor burn is..."

Me: "Touché. I wouldn't mind seeing THAT razor burn."

Jenn: "I'm old enough now that I don't get it anymore, so you're SOL."

Me: "Research shows prayer works. I'll get right on that."

Jenn: "Experience shows alcohol works, so I'm gonna get on that." :lol:


Me: "What are you doing?"

Gina: "My crotch is wet."

Me: "Excuse me?"

Gina: "Well, I'm not feeling well... and my daughter's bestfriend's mom mysteriously just died last night, and if I go today, I wanna be wearing underwear, so I've got on underwear."

Me: "Do you usually not?" :|

Gina: "No. Never!"

Me: "TMI..."

Gina: "It's riding up, too. I'm not used t--"

Me: "TMI, Gina! T-M-I!"


A customer asked me what my job entailed a few weeks ago, and I pulled a major Spoonerism when I said, "I wash bishes and stock deer."

I just had this hilarious image of me trying to cram a dead buck into a beer cooler, hooves up in the air.

And then one of the bartenders appears, "Bathtime!" :P


Sherene: "It's shot time! If you don't want a shot, buy another drink. Double-fisting is encouraged in this bar!"


Night At the Movies

A few weeks ago, I had a day off and I spent it at the movies just chilling.

Was ecstatic to see Anthony Stewart Head was in Sweeney Todd, though I wish he'd had more lines. He's such a badass librarian.

Juno was by far the best movie I saw that day, but a week later, the one I was still thinking about was Atonement. Definitely a good ending. More movies need to end like that.

Some interesting lines from Atonement that made me think. The first was the quote "the clarity of passion", which I found an incredibly interesting one since passion is generally viewed as a hindrance to logic and "clarity". Made me think. :P

The other, same movie, was "Why write a story if no one's going to read it." This is not a new question, having been around for no doubt as long as written stories have been invented. Just made me think. Why would YOU write a story no one was meant to read?

Also saw Enchanted, which was riotously hilarious. Was surprised to Idina Menzel (of RENT fame) in a supporting role in it, but was disappointed she didn't get to sing.

Was a hilarious movie, though. Disney executed the inevitable self-parody quite well, in my opinion. When Giselle's in an office at one point in the movie, the camera shows her looking into a fish tank, viewing Giselle through the tank so you can see her face as she watches the fishes and talks. What music is lightly playing in the background while she's looking into the fish tank? "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid. :lmao:

I loved it.

Go Poke Them Repeatedly

I know this is kind of a crap place to leave off on a journal, but I just need to post this. There's so much more I have to add, but for now, this will suffice.

Til next time, go bug rapidograph and haggleman to take pictures of themselves wearing their christmas and birthday presents (respectively). Those peeps are awesome, and the presents are awesome. And you need to see them. :lol:

Go bug them, nao! D:

  • Listening to: Blue October
  • Reading: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, [...]
  • Watching: Jumper
  • Playing: GTA: San Andreas
  • Eating: Fajita Chicken
  • Drinking: Vanilla Shake

Your Mom Goes to Limbo

Journal Entry: Wed Feb 6, 2008, 9:24 PM


12-16 more hours til I get internet in my new apartment, effectively ending my 9-week dryspell just in time for my 15,000th PV. :|


  • Listening to: HALCALI (what?)
  • Reading: Frankenstein
  • Watching: Buffy: Season 4
  • Playing: Musashi
  • Eating: Sesame Chicken
  • Drinking: Who loves orange soda? Kel loves orange soda.

Your Mom Goes to the 4077th

Journal Entry: Sun Dec 16, 2007, 12:30 PM

This Sucks...

So just letting everyone know I'm still alive. I miss dA immensely. I miss the chatz, I miss my helpers (and really hope that I still am a helper).

I finally heard back about why I was suspended back on the 7th of Nov. but it took the admin who had suspended me to do it. I of course deserved the suspension, I had no doubt of that the entire time. My only beef was that it took 5 weeks to get a response. I could understand the mass-ignoring on the part of the Helpdesk if I was some useless fanart-pushing Narutard who made a concerted effort every week to get banned from the chats... but I'm not.


Nonetheless, this mobile version of dA is nice but it has its limits and this accordingly, I have limits.

My computer now chooses to lock up at highly inconvenient times. The screen locks static and the capslock and scrolllock lights start flashing simultaneously. :| I don't know if this is an Ubuntu problem, but these specific symptoms never presented themselves before it. :shrug:

Idk, the SA Current (newspaper) has ads for stores that sell $99 deskops, so maybe I'll break down and by one of dems. :hmm:

I've been working 50+ hours each week, and I was sick last week... and all I wanna do when I come home is hop on dAmn... and I can't.

In the last while I've been watching a lot of M*A*S*H, so much I'm seriously entertaining the thought of becoming an Army surgeon. :hmm:

Almost done watching all of Season One, and then on to Two. :no:

So much to do; absolutely no xmas shopping done yet. D:

Love you guys,


  • Listening to: No computer means no music
  • Reading: World History
  • Watching: my computer fizzle
  • Playing: Primal Rage
  • Eating: old Pizza
  • Drinking: Royal Crown soda

Your Mom's Puter has teh HIVs! D:

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 6, 2007, 1:07 PM


So I've been absent, much to my regret. I have been out of the old apartment and into the new for about a week and a half now. I have no internet and my computer has just come down with AIDS, so how am I updating this journal? Well, my friends, that is THE REST OF THE STORY.

So no internets is pretty self-explanatory. One of the barbacks had to leave the state for "personal reasons", whatever that means, so I've been doing the barback manager a favor and picking up shifts like they was hoz. :P

The hours I work, however, have given zero time to call and schedule a new internet provider. Even if I DO get internet though, it won't do me no good because my computer has come down with a wicked case of the HIVs.

"Wow," I thought to myself last night, my computer's running slow. Now would be a good time to complete the rebirth metaphor of my new apartment by wiping my computer."

I've been planning this for a weeks now so everything was already backed up.

I restarted with the factory recovery disks. Everything was going fine until it asked me to insert the third disk.

:paranoid: "Third disk? What third disk?"

With 70% of the process complete, I couldn't undo it... so I cancelled.

Luckily, the lappy also came with a Genuine Windows XP Professional disk. The first install was cut short by the turning off of the computer due to overheating. :ohmygod: So i turned the fan my lappy sits upon up to the "Hi" setting and tried again. This time, no overheat! :#1:

But wait... after it finishes, it does the whole registration thing right? Well, I got a little queasy when I didn't find a product key on the sleeve of the cd... but I tentatively rejoiced when I remembered that all lappys shipped with winXP cds from the factory also ship with a product key sticker on the underside.


What? Invalid key? The fuck? D: And apparently this version XP isn't one I can validate later. :(

So I am puterless.

But how am I typing this entire journal? Nope, not on someone else's computer--immediate plans have been made though to use me ma's puter to download/burn ubuntu and go from there.

No, my friends, this journal has been 100% typed using my cellphone. :D

Miss y'all. Much love.


I almost forgot to mention that, a month later, I still don't know why I was suspended.

For those just joining, I was given a week's suspension back on Wednesday, Nov. 7th. I sent in an inquiry to the HD as to why but did not receive a response. After three weeks of waiting, I stll had not received a response. :|

On the 28th, exactly 3 weeks after I sent in my original inquiry, I sent in another on the advice of an admin. It has now been more than a full week since I sent in that second ticket, a month since the day my suspension began, and I still don't know why I was suspended.

I think it's pretty fair to assume that I'm being ignored.


  • Listening to: S Club 7
  • Reading: The Atlantis Encyclopedia
  • Watching: my computer fizzle
  • Playing: n/a
  • Eating: corn
  • Drinking: Royal Crown soda

Your Mom Goes to Time-Out

Journal Entry: Mon Nov 19, 2007, 1:07 PM

Wilson!! No!!

So... finally off the suspension. :phew: That was a LONG-ass week. Sent in a ticket Thursday-before-last to the HelpDesk but I have yet to hear back about why I was suspended. Guess that whole 72-hours-or-less thing goes out the window on 3-day weekends. :P That's not a slight against the HelpDesk; for all the n00bs I can only imagine they have to deal with, they more than deserve their weekends. I'm just pointing out the lack of luck on my part to be banned on Veteran's Day weekend. Passing 240 hours for my ticket. we'll see.

I find this interesting:

First day I was banned, I was all, "For what!?" so copy/pasted the link and... it's hidden. :|

Not sure why I'm being given a link that is no longer visible. :confused: I mean, I assume that if it's ban-worthy then it's also hide-worthy, but then why give it to me in the first place?

Idk, I just live here.


So being suspended coincided with my internet getting turned off. I paid my part of the bill, but my roommates believed Call of Duty 4 to be more worth their money than paying the internet bill. Yes, big people actually put off things they want to pay for to take care of things they need to pay for. :roll: I wish they'd grow up.

Actually, since the lease is up in two weeks, I don't really care if they grow up or not.

Nonetheless, this past week gave me plenty of time to finally catch up on all the downloaded shows I'd been meaning to watch, and I have to say: Doctor Who... is the shit.

You wouldn't think a person could fall for a show after only thirteen episodes--I've only watched the first season of the new remake--but I did. The characters, the writing, the stories. And the second-to-last episode. D: With Rose and the Game show and when she tried to run to the Doctor? I had been sitting at work and no sooner did that "event" happen (secrecy preserved for those who would go watch it) than my manager walked up to me and said it was time to clock in. :|

They say hearts grow fondest when they're apart, and all I thought about that entire shift was Doctor Who.

So yeah, that is definitely one of the best shows I've ever seen. ThinkGeek has a shirt with a picture of the TARDIS on it with the words below, "You Never Forget Your First Doctor". :lol: I'm not enough of a Yank that I don't know this Doctor Who isn't the first so I understand the reference the shirt is making, but there can't be another like Chris... :( And at the end of the first season? D: Who was that man?! That's not my Doctor!! Give me my old Doctor, dammit!!

Never felt that adamantly about a TV character. :lol: So yeah, it's a damn good show.

I've also downloaded Season 4 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and have been thus reminded why I love the show.

Xander: What do you think?
Buffy: I think... I say thank you.
Xander: Nothing says thank you like dollars in the waistband.

:lol: It's obviously funnier in-context, but that's still a great quote. If I remember that, I'll have to start using it. "Nothing says thanks like dollars in the waistband". ;)

It's interesting to see the introduction of Anya as an essential character. She had only appeared previously as an antagonist but, in the story, has since been stripped of her "Vengeance Demon" status is now just your normal mortal female trapped in Sunnydale, California, who also happens to be hundreds of years old... And her inter-personal skills are a bit lacking from all the killing, so this is how she hits on Xander:

Anya: I like you. You're funny, and nicely-shaped, and frankly, it's ludicrous to have these interlocking bodies and not... interlock. Please remove your clothing now.


Neologisms Are the Foundation of Our Society

So the last few weeks have been interesting at work. Lots of funny quotes, too, and happenstances.

I'm working a few weeks ago and I see this group of people milling about and it's this party of about eight or nine Asian people and they're all going to take a picture. So what do they do? Two or three do the trademark Asian peace sign, and three or four of them did the Hadoken hand gesture. :lol: I've never seen people hold a Hadoken pose for a picture before. :lol: You know, the one all the Dragonball Z characters did whenever they did "Kamehameha". :P Just thought that was funny. A little insight to the world of Asian people.

In a similar respect, only in Texas will you ever see (as I have recently seen) an Asian man wearing jeans and a cowboy hat singing the words to the Spanish song, "Sauvemente" by Elvis Crespo. :lol: Culture mix. Was cool, though. I love stuff like that. Like... seeing the bartender Brandi get on the bar with a microphone and sing all the words to "White & Nerdy" by Weird Al. :P Same vein.

Some interesting quotes I've heard over the last few weeks:

Gruff-looking Cowboy: That's way too posh.


Man: Yeah, she's carrying mah baby.

:slow: A wha? Tigershark!! :lol:

One of bartenders, Stevie, has rejoined us recently. She left for the summer to do stuff on her land, I think, but I don't know what specifically. She raises horses and I know she has a lot to do with them. This is the bartender who... well. So all of corporate are there back in May or so for the three-year aniversary, right? And Lilliana Lovell, the CEO of the entire Coyote Ugly chain asks our GM Shawna why Stevie couldn't make it, and Shawna informs her that Stevie had a prior engagement at a pig scramble.

And the room goes dead.

15 or so corporate people who weren't even in the conversation stopped talking. :lmao: Welcome to Texas.

So yes, Stevie's definitely the hick of our Coyote Ugly.

But so yeah, Stevie has, in the past month, come back to rejoin us at Coyote. I remember working with her before she did her hiatus, but it was briefly and we never once talked. But now... :lol: It would seem that she's very good at losing things.

Stevie: "Have you seen my bar key? I threw it back here somewhere when I got up on the bar to dance."
Me: "Here, it's behind this register."

She lost her compact the other night. I found it. She lost her wine multiple times. I found them all. She lost her bar key so I let her use mine, which she also lost, but I found both by the end of the night. :lol: So what does she say?

Stevie: You're like a human purse.

:P I suppose. Never been called a purse before, but I guess that's a more accurate description of what I do than anything else. I personally carry bar keys, antacids, candy, mints, deodorant, floss, painkillers, and such for myself, but everyone is more than welcome to use them. :shrug:

Another quote heard revolves around one of the new bartenders, who goes by the name Victoria.

She's pretty cool. Still new to the whole bartending thing, but she's getting there. The interesting part is her story, where she's from and such. Born in Dubai, Iraq, but her family moved to a bunch of place: Switzerland, Columbia, and such. Her accent's cute, too. We were talking in the office after work this past weekend and she kept pronouncing it "Vateran's Day" with a very wide, drawn out A. :P Sherene was trying to show Victoria how to do an EE sound (like in cheese), but she kept saying it with an EH sound, e.g. chehz. :P Was cute. Victoria actually confided last night that she knows English, French, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, Arabic, and Afrikaans. And I believe it. I've only heard her speak Arabic, Spanish, and (obviously) English, but I believe the others.

Anyway, Victoria has "very large knockers", as one bartender put it. Very very large.

So the other day I'm minding my own business behind the bar and Sherene gets up on the bar with the mic and announces to the entire bar: (direct quote)

Sherene: Excuse me. Can I have your attention, please? I would like to let everyone know that Victoria has ginormous breasticles. [Actual words] And that's why we're playing, "Guess the bra size"!! Guesses are $5 each, winner gets a free drink worth more than $5. If you think you can grasp... *laughs* I said grasp. Well, I thought it was funny...

I don't have a (good) picture of Victoria yet, but I

Guesses were tossed around the bar of 34D, 36DD, etc. but nobody won because the winning size was 36F. D: And, Victoria informed us on the mic so everyone on the San Antonio Riverwalk could hear, she has actually had a reduction. They used to be HHs. :|

I'm not by any means marveling at some personal attraction, there is such a thing as overkill. :hmm: I'm not (to use Sherene's terminology) a "breasticle" guy, anyways.

And the last quote on the list is also from Stevie. Last Sunday, Stevie got very, very toasted behind the bar. As in, leaning-on-me-heavily toasted. :lol: Whenever she whispered to me (which seemed to happen more and more the drunker she got), she would whisper into my neck instead of my ear. :lmao: But yeah, she had confided earlier in the evening that she had a major headache. I am a carrier of the jumbo bottle of Advil Liqui-Gel caps, but said nothing. Well, sometime before the end of the night, she saw my bottle of Advil sticking out of my backpack since I had used it not too long before.

Stevie: Whose is this?
Me: Mine.
Stevie: But I told you I had a headache.
Me: You did. You're also very drunk. I'm not giving you painkillers.
(Didn't hear a word I said)
Stevie: I have Excedrin upstairs but it's in the office. Which do you think would work better?
Me: Neither.
(Still didn't head a word I said)
Stevie: Would Excedrin work better? It has caffeine in it.

I knew any explanation of why caffeine would not be the solution to mixing painkillers and alcohol would bounce right off her head, so I just told I didn't know which would work better.

Me: I haven't read the label so I wouldn't know how it would react with alcohol.
Stevie: Aww, you're safe. That's cute.

:roll: Tard. :P

That was a new thing, though, to be outright called "safe". I mean, its not bad, it's not like I've lived the past 20-something years of my life a certain way just so people would call me "unsafe". It's just weird to be called such directly. :P

Oh, and the LAST last quote on the list:

Sunday night I'm just doing some menial cleaning behind the bar to keep myself busy and I walk over to one of the security, right? He's been cut early so he's sitting at the bar enjoying a beer, and I walk over and there's this pile of cleaning towels on the bar. And they have green stuff on them. :| So I pick one up for the security guy to see.

Me: Hey, Alex? Why's it green?
Alex: Dude, that's gotta be the worst question ever.

And we both laughed for a long time about that, but it got me thinking about how it really IS the worst question to ask.

Doctor: Congratulations, it's a boy.
Dad: Why's it green?


Worker: Here's your Big Mac, sir.
Customer: Why's it green?

Definitely an interesting question.

I Love My Job

So I was planning on just posting this journal as-is, but I'm glad I held off because an interesting series of events collided last night. :3

The main characters are
Brandi: Heart of Glass. Pretty Glass. by DJStrife
Sherene: Only Blue Ones by DJStrife

And me.

I don't remember how we came on the subject, but Brandi and I were discussing about how she (apparently) used to snap at customers. I personally remember AN incident way back when in which she snapped at a customer, but the customer deserved it.

Anyways, no sooner did we discuss her "problem" and how it has gotten much better over the last 6 months than in walked a group. :| A guy and two girls.

Brandi says to me, "Hold on" and she goes to help the group.

One of the girls, who is plainly already drunk, says to Brandi, "You're cute, but you're not that good. I've seen way better bitches in my time."

And Brandi (sincerely) replies, "I like you. What can I get you to drink, baby?"

"You can't get me anything I want."


And Brandi confided later she also heard the girl say to her friend, "She's not that cute. She thinks she is, but she's not."

So Brandi blows her off. Whatever, right? Brandi decides not to deal with the girl, who orders through the guy she's with. :roll: After getting their drinks, the war began, though "war" implies both sides fight. Nu-uh. :P

I had been standing right there the entire time, and Brandi walked down the bar to let Sherene in on what had just happened.

So... Brandi gets up on the bar to dance just so she won't have to interact with the customers. She dances her normal way on the bar, but every so often she dances RIGHT in front of the bitch from before. Just to piss her off. :lol:

Well, it turns out that not only is the bitch a bitch, she's also... pregnant. :| Wow.

So Sherene, and this is why I love her, gets on the microphone, addresses the bar, and reads aloud for everyone to hear the Surgeon General's warning label on a bottle of beer. This is what she says:

"GOVERNMENT WARNING: (1) According to the Surgeon General, women should not drink alcoholic beverages during pregnancy because of the risk of birth defects. (2) Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems.".

And Sherene read that out loud to the entire bar for the sake of the prego bitch. :lmao: And the look on all of our faces... utter shock. :omg:

But the war doesn't end there.

20 minutes later, it's "Shot Time", the time where everyone in the bar is supposed to buy a shot and they all take one giant toast together.

Well, Sherene gets on the mic and says, "Shot time!! That's right, ladies and gentlemen, it's shot time for everyone... who's not prego. :lmao:

And we all again lost it. Or at least we trying not to. We still have to operate behind the bar and maintain some sense of professional decorum, yes? :lol:

Rule One of Professional Decorum: Do not openly laugh feet from the preggo drunk bitch at her expense.

Well, she tried to "dance" (if that's what you could call it) with the guy (though it was obvious they aren't together) but she ended up falling into this foxy Asian girl. D:<

Nevertheless, Brandi got permission to have her kicked out, and she was.

As the preggo bitch and her friends are leaving the bar, Sherene gets on the mic ONE last time and says, "Hell hath no fury like a Coyote scorned... by a pregnant bitch."

:lmao: Great night. Made almost no money, but great night. :D

Oh, and my new apartment is all bought and ready. I move in next week!! :spaz:



  • Listening to: Cassandra Wilson
  • Reading: The Lure and Romance of Alchemy
  • Watching: Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 4
  • Playing: NFS: Most Wanted
  • Eating: Kashi
  • Drinking: soda

Your Mom Goes to Ego-Chimp's House

Journal Entry: Mon Oct 29, 2007, 2:04 AM

So Much Better Live, Too.

So definitely some interesting things since my last post.

The Natasha Bedingfield concert was awesome. The concert was hosted by the local radio station Mix 96.1, and presented upstairs on the second floor of Coyote Ugly. More specifically, the concert was hosted by the radio DJs Russell Rush and JoJo.

Unfortunately, Natasha was supposed to sing ten songs but she only sang five. Russell confided later after she'd left that she apparently wasn't feeling well.

But so yeah. Awesome concert.

I managed to snap off this:

Whozyerdaddeh? :lol:

When she arrived for sound check, I was upstairs (not yet on the clock) playing "Where In the World Is Carmen Sandiego" on my lappy.

Well, she and her guitarist started warming up and I got to watch and sing along, my own little private concert. :P

At one point, I turned to her boyfriend (some large American guy), and I said, "You're a lucky man."

And he smiled back, "Yes I am." :lol:

So that was cool.

Slight Alteration

As a personal experiment not too long ago while bored, I decided to see how easy it would be to alter an aspect of my handwriting. I have fairly distinctive handwriting and was simply curious as to how concrete it was.

So... I changed how I write lower-case Y's. :P

And it worked. So well, in fact, that I'd forgotten til recently I'd altered my writing style.

(I know this is an incredibly uninteresting topic, but go with it.)

Now I see in retrospect that I used to do the long stroke first and the short stroke second because the short stroke continues to the right and my flow was thus preserved. I have since reversed it and now do the long stroke last.

The result?

Aside from having distinctive writing, I'm also known for my not-neat writing. So not-neat, my father used to make me write lines when I was a kid solely for the purpose of improving my penmanship, but it wasn't particularly effective.

Whereas at first the long stroke was annoying to do last since it interrupted my eastward flow of writing, I kinda like it now. It's a nice definitive pause. A concerted ending to a word.

My lowercase Y's also come out much more elegant, dare I say so without losing anymore face than I've already lost in the eyes of the Man Council.

Soon I hope. D:

So there's been much talking about the new locations.

City council talks are apparently already underway to open a Coyote Ugly in Toronto, Canadia.

There is also work underway to find a location to open at in Australia. :D

And there is also mention of a proposed location in a certain Latin American country, but I don't remember which. :ohmygod:

And some of the bartenders and I were talking about that last night and how awesome it would be to be one of the select few people chosen to open a new bar. A "traveling coyote", as the term goes.

So badass.

Last time the regional manager Daniel was here, I kinda threw some questions to him about the possibility of barbacks switching bars for a few weeks like the bartenders do, but he said it probably wouldn't go through (since the approval would have to come from Lil herself) because of the need to delegate a budget for said barbacks (for room, board, transportation, etc).

But..., he said, there were plenty of events to try and get a foot in. From what he said, the Austin bar had some event a number of months ago and the San Antonio barback/manager Richard got to go and barback at Austin. And I wanna do that. :(

Shout out to the Austin girls.

So I have that to look forward to.

From what the San Antonio GM was saying yesterday, the next UFC fight is going to be hosted by Coyote Ugly, the Coyote brand on the cage and everything.

And apparently Coyote Ugly is also hosting the next Bob Marley festival here in San Antonio. Some of the bartenders are reportedly going to dance some of the signature songs on-stage, too. :slow:


Pain Lies on the Riverside

One of my (if not the) favorite Coyotes, Dawn, has departed our establishment. :(

I won't go into why (both because I don't know all the specifics and because it's none y'all's bidniss :P) but she left over very large personal issues and differences with another employee. She now
works not 100 feet down the road at another bar called "The Basement" (and had been working there as a second job while employed at Coyote), but now she's there full time.

I still see her every now and then (her berfday was Thursday), but I don't see her nearly as much and I miss her. :( The first bartender to really make me feel welcome to Coyote. First one who took the effort to get to know me. :)


The Remake Sucked :(

So a couple days ago, right? I get on the clock, replacing Richard the barback manager. He's at the end of the bar drinking a beer and he's wearing some kind of hoody. :o But he's wearing it draped over his head, unbuttoned. And I mosey on over to Terri, one of the bartenders, and I ask her, "Doesn't Richard look like he should be running away from the FBI, an alien in the basket of his bicycle?" :lol:

And she laughs, and replies, "I was thinking more Unabomber, but that works too." :P

And then Terri digresses and tells me she actually went to the same high school as Henry Thomas and was actually really good friends with him until he made E.T. :hmm: According to Terri, when he came back from making the movie, he became a real a dick. As she put it, "He pretended he didn't even know me."

Asshat. :hmm:

It's just interesting to find out who was how close to whom.

Points of Interest On Your Map

* On the way to Walgreens (pharmacy) the other day, "Pretty Young Thing" by Michael Jackson jumped into my head. Upon entering the store, I noticed "Thriller" playing on the sound system overhead.

* I've recently started buying skim milk because I have arrived at the conclusion that it doesn't taste so different that I won't buy it. It's milk. And it's healthier than other milk. In connection with this, I've noticed that skim milk LOOKS different. :lol:

* The phrase "peanut brittle" is weird to me. I just find it weird that this is another case of a word being marketed by the change of its part of speech. Translation? "Brittle" is an adjective, but you turn it into a noun and suddenly you have a new word for candy?

* Was walking through a department store the other day when I saw a sign advertise "HOBO Apparel". :| Wow.

* I suddenly remembered the other day a specific event from long ago. This event took place probably about March of this year: namely, a staff-wide cleaning of the Firehouse pub where I was then employed. I remembered seeing the cook Josh wearing a specific shirt that had a logo on it. And I flipped out. :P

"You're a deviant?" I asked.


"A deviant. On deviantART? What's that shirt then?"

This is the logo the shirt had:

Ignoring the "oh yeah".

If you saw that for a split second on a shirt, wouldn't you think it was devWear? But it's not.

It's the logo for a brand of apparel and accessories called "Little Devil". :P

Just thought that was interesting.

Took me seven months to finally get it out, but I said it. :lol:

My Halloween's Already Over

I worked Saturday (a few days ago) and that was the big Halloween party at Coyote Ugly.

I was going to go in anyways because the managers wanted me to take pictures--you know you're finally making photographer points when people start asking you to shoot events without you suggesting it first. The day of, though, one of the barbacks called me because he wanted to trade shifts. So... I worked Halloween for him, taking pictures along the way. :P

And boy was it an event. Rollercoaster ride: on top one moment, pitfall the next, and back up. Though I forgot the jokes or happenings, there were some times where I was busting my ass laughing.

One of the girls tried to do a cartwheel on the bar but when she landed she did some kind of twist and rolled off the bar, off the cooler, and onto the floor. :lmao: It was the exact kind of roll you see Jackie Chan do when he gets knocked out a window. Funny. Shit.

The other barback walks over and... does he help her up? :lol:

She's laughing her ass off on the floor behind the bar, so he reaches past her, double-taps the POS screen to bring up the clock, and writes down the time so he can show everyone on the hidden camera system later in the evening. :rofl: You fuck up on camera at Coyote, someone who sees it is going to check the time. :no: :P

So yeah, it was a fun-filled evening with lots of scantily-clad bartenders (see submitted deviations) and awesome costumes from customers.

A regular known to us as Jeffrey Dahmer was the one who won the Nascar tickets we were giving away. :no: He doesn't have any friends so the fact that the tickets are ON the track with a party hosted for him by a certain energy drink company is wasted on the fact that he's going to be the only one there. No friends. :no:

I'll let the pics show what happened. :P They tell it better.

On an interesting aside, I was talking with Russel Rush (the DJ from Mix 96.1) during the course of the night and he asked if I could send him all the pics I took. Email information was retrieved, along with whether he knew what a "zip" file is and how to operate one, which he said he did.

And now 52 of the "good" 89 Halloween pictures I shot are on the Mix 96.1 website. You can go see them if you want. I'm only posting a sliver over 20 here on deviantART, so the Mix website has a more complete example of what I shot.

Special thanks to Russell for that. :)

Excuse Me While I Spank My Ego-Chimp

So a week or so ago I was working a day shift with a certain bartender (who shall at this time remain anonymous because she asked me not to tell anyone) when she made an interesting comment.

She was dancing on the bar like a goofball, being an overall dork, and she looked over and saw me laughing to myself while watching her. To be honest, she was having a lot of fun dancing like a dork and her goofiness is infectious, so I laughed. And she gave me this pouty face she does.

When she finished dancing and got off the bar, she came over to where I was and asked why I was laughing. And I said it was nothing, smiling the entire time. And she pushed it, really wanting to know. As she put it, I "intimidate her", and knowing why I was laughing would make her feel less self-conscious.

That struck me on a really weird chord because I've never had anyone tell me they were intimidated by me. I know there are people that HAVE been, likely more than I've noticed, but it's a whole different thing completely to have someone outright say it to you.

And it kinda put me off for a second; I really didn't know how to respond to that. I've always associated someone being "intimidated" with someone being "scared" so you can understand why I was a bit confused. The bartender-in-question and I have a great relationship so it threw a rock in the cogs of my thinking that she was scared of me.

I think she sensed my apprehension because she followed by saying, "I think I'm just intimidated by you, though, because you're one of the few people here whose intelligence I really respect."

"Huh?" :slow:

Complete about-face.

No but really, her being "intimidated" by me made sense then. What she was saying that I was one of the few people there whose opinion matters to her. :lol: And that made me feel happy.

It's not everyday you receive an acknowledgement like that. :)

Which is what makes this next one even better... :paranoid:

So Saturday night we were all closing up after the big-ass Halloween party, right?

And I was doing some closing activity and I caught the tail-end of the conversation between the above-mentioned bartender and someone else. And the line that caught my attention was, " counselor." :lol:

And I turn to the bartender and I say, "What, like a camp counselor?"

And she laughs and says, "Hello, kids, and welcome to Camp Hiawannasuckock."

And we both laughed really hard about that. And then she turns to face me and says, (her words) "That's why I love you. You get me. I mean, you're smart, funny, you take pictures (lol), you eat sushi (revealed in a conversation earlier in the evening). Will you marry me?"

In a deadpan serious tone I replied, "Idk, I'll have to discuss it with my boyfriend."

Much more laughing on both our parts, the joke being that I'm straight, as she well knows.

"That would be ironic if you were gay," she laughs.

"'Cause that would complete the cliche?" I smiled.


So yeah, that was an incredible boost to my ego. Sometimes you just need to hear out-loud how much people appreciate you.

Said bartender is also driving to the Dane Cook concert in December and she wants to know who else wants to go.

:wave: Hell-to-the-mutherfuckin-yeah!


I don't really have anything in particular to say for a closing. Go check out randomaxes' latest journal; he is kickin' ass and takin' names on a bicycle. :lol:

Anyone who lives in South Texas will appreciate what he's done.

Show your staff some love (now).

Stay deviant.


  • Listening to: Various
  • Reading: The Drawing of the Three - Stephen King
  • Watching: Pride &amp; Prejudice
  • Playing: Halo 3
  • Eating: Creamy Chicken Ramen
  • Drinking: Fruit Punch

Your Mom Goes to Buffy Fan Conventions

Journal Entry: Thu Oct 18, 2007, 6:20 AM

Contents Under Pressure

I was going to write something about root beer, but now I don't remember what. It was hilarious at the time--enough to warrant me writing down "root beer" on a slip of paper--but I have long forgotten what was specifically funny.


The empty 2-liter bottle of root beer next to the bed I now sit upon seems to taunt me saying, "I was funny once, but not anymore. What now, fucker?"

Stupid root beer.

So... make up your own hilarious memory of root beer and pretend that's what I told you. :P

The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie

I was at work last week chilling in the entryway behind the bar wherein sits the ice machine, and the assistant manager Tony joined me.

I was casually standing in the dark, leaning against the ice machine, when Tony's iPhone caught my eye. He had pulled it out and begun to check something on it, but not before I glimpsed the wallpaper of his phone.

In my defense I had glanced over his shoulder, a shoulder which obscured part of the wallpaper. I'm not sure WHAT I saw, but what I saw registered in my mind as, "Damn, she was hot!"

So I asked Tony, "Who was that?"


"The girl in your wallpaper; she's fine."

And he kinda stares at me a second before pressing the back button on his phone. "Davinci thought so, too."

I look and his wallpaper is the Mona Lisa. :|

And Tony lolled. And I felt like an idiot. :ohmygod:

I don't know what the hell I saw before, but some subconscious synapse in my brain saw the Mona Lisa and spat out, "Bang her!"

Felt like an idiot. :no: And I said as much. Luckily Tony's a cool guy so he laughed with me and took it in stride.

And Just What Kind of Doctor Is He?

Note to Self:

Next time you spend an almost-solid hour playing Dr. Mario from Level 1 on up, don't die on the very last level with only 5 virii to go. :no:

Major Phails.

So This Should Be Interesting...

Tomorrow (Friday), we're apparently going to have a little acoustic concert at my place of employment. During the course of the concert, the downstairs jukebox will be made inoperable so that the music won't disturb the concert on the second floor.

The music star of the evening is going to be none other than...

Natasha Bedingfield :lol:

I'm not sure how that was swung (or indeed who did the swinging), but the local Pop/Top40 radio station Mix 96.1 is hosting the invitation-only concert. Coyote Ugly is a country-western bar with fringes of rock and roll so I'm a bit confused at how the organizers arrived at choosing our location, but I'm elated nonetheless.

I first came across Natasha (reminiscing moment) back when I used Kazaa. I was searching for music from the UK and her song "These Words" came up. Keep in mind this was sufficiently long enough ago that her album had been released in the UK, but had not yet hit US radio. To be honest, I didn't think it ever would if but for the fact that I assumed I had discovered some unknown artist who would never reach the US (since I have discovered my fair share of those.)

So anyways, she performs tomorrow. It's invitation-only, but I work that night so I will at least get to see her. I asked to work solo that night (no other barbacks) and my request was given the green, but now I'm kind of regretting it. :ohmygod:


If I had worked with another barback like scheduled, I would have a better chance of getting to listen to her during the course of the night. You know, standing there and watching. :shrug: Oh well.

Can't beat a free concert. :P

Out on the p2p network there's an mp3 of her singing her version of "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol. Awesome cover. I hope she does it tomorrow.

I wonder how early she'll get there. If I might get to meet her.

Think she'll sign my chest? :excited:

"No, open the door and come in..."

My mom got me a book of Anton Chekhov's. :o In its original Russian. Been a long time since I even looked at anything Russian, so I'm gonna have to brush up. I certainly remember enough Russian to recognize that it is a collection of short stories by Chekhov, but the greater translation is going to take a bit of "brushing up", so to speak. :P

It'll be fun.

Srsly TMI. Wtf?

I wake up yesterday, right? Walk out of my room to the kitchen to get a drink, but my roommate Rob is already there.

I say hi. He says hi.

"Hey," he mutters, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Umm, sure."

He verbally stutters for a second before, "What do you do when your foreskin tears?"

"Excuse me?" :|

"Tiare and I were having sex last night, and next thing  we knew the condom was full of blood," he continues.


If that's not a "TMI" situation, I don't know what is. :no: Still gives me goosebumps.

More Mo'Betta Later

With the advent of devFilm--I have heard/seen noone else call it "devFilm", but it will inevitably come to be called this so remember where you saw it first (me of course :P)--I gathered the gumption to reacquire one of my favorite programs, Cinema4D. My experience with animating has been limited to Imageready, but my experience of keyframing is fairly broad thanks to Final Cut Pro.

An hour of modeling and keyframing, and 2.5 hours of rendering have produced me my first-ever CG animation: a 15 second 800x600 short of Fella looking around and manipulating various limbs. It's not "Over the Hedge", but I like it. :D

So yeah. Now that the medium in that respect is available to me, I hope to begin producing something solid in the coming weeks. If anyone wants to collab, hit me with any ideas you have. :)

The Joke Is That He Never Comes

So I'm a big fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I'm not a fanboy, don't get me wrong; I simply love the writing. Joss Whedon writes like I do. His humor hits me on multiple fronts at the same time because it's the exact kind of humor I myself enjoy reading and writing.

So imagine my surprise yesterday when, while watching Season 3, Buffy made a very Gilmore-Girls-ish comment. Faith (Eliza Dushku) was late, and one of the other characters asked if she was going arrive soon.

And Buffy off-handedly commented that she doubted it. Faith (as Buffy put it), "makes Godot look punctual".


And I lolled hardcore.

I have seen every episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer so I'm not sure how I missed that witty comment back when I first watched the series back in Winter 2004, but I caught it this time.

Just makes me respect Joss Whedon so much more.

Granted, I'm not sure how Buffy, a high school senior, is knowledgable of Beckett's work since Beckett was never part of any of the English curriculums at the high school I attended, but how Buffy came to know Godot is irrelevant.

Joss Whedon not only made a funny, but he made an extremely clever and obscure one, and that's why I love him.


In closing, I might post another journal entry after the concert tomorrow, but unless something incredible happens, I doubt it. It is not at all impossible for me to work a Friday shift by myself, but there are many Friday shifts where working solo means 8 solid hours of running up and down stairs and carrying cases and cases of beer. So basically, the work is good.

Til then, check out abutton's latest journal (and subsequent news article). She brings to light an interesting happenstance in our world.

Show your staff some love.

Stay deviant.

And for cris'sake, don't come running to me if your foreskin tears. :roll:

  • Listening to: Natasha Bedingfield
  • Reading: Comic books...
  • Watching: Bob Saget on Broadway
  • Playing: Halo 3
  • Eating: Chicken
  • Drinking: Ice Tea

Your Mom Goes to the HeavySide Layer

Journal Entry: Mon Sep 24, 2007, 2:43 PM

Why Shit On A Perfectly Good Cake?

Sheesh. How can work be so slow and yet take up so much time? :hmm:

So, just on an off-note, I'd like to take this moment to admonish all smokers on here. I love you all, but you're morons. Idiots. I love you, but... no. Retarded.

I spent the last two days out of asthma medicine, trying to piggy-back on long-expired inhalers from almost a decade ago, holding out until today (Monday) because my work doesn't have direct deposit and I didn't have enough money in my bank at the time to purchase a new subscription and I was unable to get to my bank in time for its weekend business hours because Wells Fargo is a cess pit of all things unholy and obscene.

After getting 8 hours of sleep last night (in two hour bursts; I woke up every two hours unable to breath and had to remedicate myself), I did the bank thing, did the pharmacy thing, and now I'm $223 poorer. :lol:

And this prescription is supposed to last me thirty days, but it's just so goshdarn cheap I try to stretch it to two months.

And whenever I'm sitting there with no asthma medicine, my upper back muscles screaming because I'm trying so hard to expand my shit-on-a-shingle lungs, I can't help but wonder why people smoke. At 22, I'm where most smokers will be when they're 40+. And lemme just say... it sucks.

If I don't have my specific medicine, when I walk down the street I'm not focusing on my music or random thoughts, but on trying to detect if someone wearing perfume or fragranced lotion walks in front me suddenly. One solid whiff of anything perfumed is enough to cause an attack. Me? Yeah, when everyone else breathes in to enjoy a fragrance, I'm the one person holding my breath. I fuckin' love it. ;)

Dreading stairs.

Dreading walking.

Dreading lifting.

Feeling incompetent at your job because you can barely climb stairs, walk, or lift without wheezing like a dying horse.

It's all a barrel of shits and giggles. :P

So, I won't apologize for being straight-forward, because I have already felt (just this morning) what most smokers don't. I was born with lungs many people purposefully try to aim for. So let me just say to all smokers: Grow the fuck up.

Again, I love you all to pieces, I'd jump in front of a n00b for any of you, but stop.

You don't know what it's like, not fully, and I love you all enough that I'd rather you not know.

And no bunting, either.

So last week I'm sitting at work, an hour and a half early, re-reading Chuck Palahniuk's "Diary"--more on this later--when Richard, the barback manager, walks by. He pauses and says, "You're still not done with that?"


"Wait, that wasn't you, that was Wasko," he corrects himself, referring to one of the bartenders who reads a lot. "Wait, no," he corrects again, "it was... uh, Jayden."

I was gonna say. That was my second day of re-reading "Diary", and you (and by you, I mean Richard) didn't see me reading it yesterday...

You ready?

So Richard shakes his head in mock disappointment, and I hear him mutter, "Fag."

I know he's joking, and I can understand the insult--the cover of "Diary" is not going to be emulated by the World Cup anytime soon, with its pastel yellow background and blood-red flowers.

And I know he's just doing the typical guy behavior of questioning in fun another guy's sexuality, but I go all serious: "You know who this is, right?" pointing to the author's name.

"No." From the look on his face, you'd think I asked him to name the first 10 subfactorials.

(...!3 = 2, !4 = 9, !5 = 44, !6 = 265....)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those elitest literary "auteurs" who expects everyone to know every author, but I'm not one to take blind insults, either. Especially when I know very well the insulter knows nothing of what he/she is insulting. :P You wanna poke fun, fine, but no potshots from left-field, kthx. I don't play IgnoranceBall.

"This is the guy who wrote 'Fight Club'," I say.


"Hey," Richard changes the subject, "did you ever finish reading the Harry Potter?"

Yes, he actually said the Harry Potter. It wasn't stressed, but was just an interesting  grammatical error to make. Of the ones he could have gone with, he chose an article?

10 seconds ago, this guy was calling me a fag. Again, I know it was in fun, but I still find the sudden twist humorous.

I nod.

"Man, I haven't finished it yet," he concludes.


I nod.

He leaves. :lol:

People is weird.

Fud Es Gud

On another note, I've been taking in the food of the local area here in Downtown San Antonio. I spend almost every day here (since I work almost every day here) and so have decided to make an effort to slough off my ignorance and start trying new things. I don't have a TON of friends--more on this later, as well--and the ones I do have are asleep when I'm awake. To rephrase, I work when they don't, they work when I don't. The rest don't live in the area, so they're usually not available to fly a 1,000 miles for a lunch date so I usually end up trying new places by myself. Another reason I usually end up trying places by myself is because I'll arrive at work a few hours early and try someplace before I go in. This saves time. :P

Anyways, I'm getting off track. I've been trying some new places in the surrounding area (my reach will extend as time likewise extends). Pat O'Brien's (which smoking-mirrors and I have a rain-check for) serves very good Cajun food. Schilo's on Commerce street serves very good Broccoli cheese soup, though only on mondays.

(I capitalized Broccoli because, to be honest, it doesn't look right lower-case. Don't ask why, that's just a personal conviction.)

Coyote Ugly (my work) sits directly on top of the "Original Mexican Restaurant" and its partner-bar, the Naked Iguana, and also on top of Boudro's, another mexican restaurant. Not including Rainforest Cafe (since I used to work there) and Starbucks, I've been trying other little places in the wall, as well. In all fairness to Starbucks, though, they had the best chicken salad sandwich the other day. It had cranberries in it. :lol: I would never have thought of that, but damn it was good.

And just yesterday I stopped by a little lounge called "Drink" on Market Street, not to be confused with the lounge "Zinc" not 40 feet around the corner. Awesome chicken/garlic/provolone panini. Awesome grapefruit/orange martini the bartender made up. Her name was Ashley.

My main point:

I went to "Original Mexican Restaurant" a few weeks or so ago. I had a few hours before work started, but I was about to start re-reading "Diary" and so would take the food with me and eat and read at the same time. Or so I thought.

I had been been eating pretty healthy the last few weeks, which I would ask applause for, but it's becoming increasingly easier and easier. It is taking smaller and smaller portions of junk food to make me sick, these days. I splurged last night when Tiffany gave me a small KIDS bag of cheetohs, the bag that would fit in a lunchbox. I hadn't had cheetohs in years and gave them a try, and I couldn't finish the bag. I got sick. :hmm:

So when I walked into Original Mexican Restaurant, I was hoping to get something moderately healthy. I know that's tricky with Mexican food in the first place, but what the hell.

I walk up to the bartender to place a to-go order, and he gives me a menu.

And then I asked him what HE liked to eat.

I don't know where I picked up this habit, but recently I've started asking people what THEY get. This is not particularly because there are "bad" choices I want to avoid, I just wonder what other people eat. It's also an effort to branch out and try new things (I had the weirdest salad the other day), and it seems people don't usually order what I order. I do this at my Chinese hole-in-the-wall, at Quiznos, and that day at Original Mexican.

Without missing a beat, the bartender points to "pollo enchilada con mole sauce dinner", or something along those lines. My spanish sucks.

Despite living in San Antonio almost all my life, I have to ask what the mole sauce is. He tells me it's a chocolate sauce. :|

Enchiladas... with chocolate.

Could he have picked a worse dish for me? :lmao:

So I ordered it. And when it came, I took it upstairs to Coyote and ate it.

And... omg. :|

It's not chocolate in the sense of Hershey's-chocolate-milk chocolate, it was Mexican chocolate: cocoa. Mexican chocolate's different. And it was spicy, too. Take a lightly spicy chicken enchilada dish and throw in the odd sweet under-taste.


It was so good. I'm sure if you had it, your reaction wouldn't be the same as mine, but that doesn't matter.

I mixed in the rice (which was incredible in of itself) and beans (as well exceptional) and the little salad accompanying it. Mixed it all with the enchiladas...


The entire time I was eating the enchiladas, I literally kept saying, "Oh my god..." Those enchiladas were better than that meatloaf I had the other day (re: previous journal). Those chicken enchiladas with mole sauce were... are you ready?... they were better than most of the sex I've had. :|

I know that's a weird statement, but goddamn, those enchiladas. You just... you have no idea. I know I sound (or rather look) like a blathering idiot, but they were so damn good. I sat there on the couch upstairs in Coyote for a solid half-an-hour afterwards just reminiscing about those enchiladas.

Some of the sex I've had (I can be honest, they don't look here I think), and I know some of you know what I mean, you finish and you thoroughly enjoyed it but your next thoughts are, "I wonder if I have any mail?" or "I wonder if Quiznos is still open?" or even "I wonder how Lenny Kravitz can afford all that crap with as lousy a music career as he's had?"

Those enchiladas? No afterthoughts except... you guessed it... "oh my god".

I actually had a brief hallucination where Paula, Simon, and Randy all gave their general assent that those were the best enchiladas ever. (Don't ask, I was watching something on youtube the other day.)

So yeah. PLEASE, if you live in the San Antonio area, I would love another excuse to go back again. Granted, I will go back again anyways, but sometimes it's nice to listen to people talk while you eat.

Why Are the Hottest Girls Always...


So the reason I'm re-reading Chuck Palahniuk is because of... a girl. Why else? :P

One of the new waitresses is this guh-horgeous girl named... Jayden. I've worked "with" her before, as in on the same night, but she always worked/s merchandise, a counter I never have accord to walk past, much less linger at, during the shifts we work. So when I worked a day shift a few days ago where she was the only waitress, I was more than glad.

I won't give you her myspace (cuz I know very well some of you would run to tell her everything about me) but know that she is gorgeous. And she likes Chuck Palahniuk.

During the day shift the other day, she was hungry so she asked if I would go with her to get some food. She didn't know where to go, so I harangued off a list of places in the area, and she rested on Schilo's across the street. She ordered and we sat down to wait.

She asked me what I liked to do, and I told her I liked to write.

She perked up at this and so I continued. I'm not really used to talking about myself and for some unknown, inexplicable reason (;)) I was very nervous, but I talked anyways. She seemed genuinely interested, so that alone was worth indulging her, right? I was talking about the less-interesting aspects of the film industry: optioning, scripts, the Writer's Guild, etc. but again she seemed genuinely interested so I talked. I ended that topic before it droned to a slow roll.

I had my Rebel with me--I always take it with me when I go outside while at work--and we started talking about photography next, and she really liked that. Apparently she wants to be a photographer, though she doesn't have her own camera. :(

That's okay, though, because she said honestly she was more interested in the studio aspect of it. I asked her to elaborate and she actually prefers the setting, clothing, makeup, lighting, shadow, and all that to the actual taking of the picture. So... everything BUT the click of the shutter. :P

But we still talked about that for a long while. I mentioned deviantART (I don't think anyone on this site realizes how much I plug dA in everyday conversation) and she said she had heard of it.

I know I'm not showing it here, but we talked for a good long while about writing and photography. Enough so, apparently, that at the end of the shift, when I was walking her to her car, she gave me a hug. I wouldn't normally make anything out of a hug, but this wasn't just A hug. This wasn't (as I was telling lemontea) a one-arm to-the-side nice-to-meet-you hug, this was a two-arm all-the-way-around personal hug. The kind of hug you get from people you really like to get hugs from. And this was the first day we'd ever talked, so this was basically the first day we ever met for real.

I don't know, I just think that's nice.

I spent a day shift with one of the other new waitresses, Mari, and we had an awesome time playing Jenga and talking and stuff.

And at the end of the shift I was walking her to her car (this seems to be a pivotal element) and she casually asked, "So where do you live?"

And I told her. And she said, "Really? I live right down the road, in Royal Ridge."

Royal Ridge is the neighborhood where my step-mom and dad live, it's a 5 minute walk from where I live. Literally, just down the road. I told her as much.

"Here," she says, "take my number. You know, in case you ever need anything."

:innocent: "Okay."

And for a THIRD waitress, let's talk about Sarah. She's the latest deviation in my gallery. As the description of the deviation says, she told me she wasn't photogenic, upon seeing me with my camera. I am a proponent of the idea that everyone is photogenic, just not necessarily in every way. As weird or blunt as it may sound, some people just shouldn't smile when they have pictures taken of them. Some people come out looking like clowns, or psychos, or Margaret Thatcher. Other people only look good from the side; some people only look good from below. So when someone says they aren't photogenic, I take that as a challenge to find the way in which they ARE.

And I believe I succeeded with Sarah. :P

After I'd taken the picture, I showed it to her on the LCD display of the camera, and she conceded that I had indeed gotten the right pic. And she casually mentioned that she wanted a copy. And I casually consented that she would get one. Well, apparently she didn't remember that. :P

Day before yesterday, I worked with her for the first time since I took the pic of her, and she asked if she could get a copy of it. And I said, "It's at home. I would have brought it but I didn't know you were working tonight." I'd ordered it the day the print was approved and it had actually come just that morning.

And she was elated. I brought it the next day (yesterday) but she had to wait til the end of the day to see it because it was up in the locked office upstairs. So I'm cleaning up after we already closed at the end of the night, and she comes downstairs with the cardboard tube in her hands, and she says that its "Amazing."

Well, I don't know about amazing (as the photographer, I would actually prefer to reshoot and get a better source file :lol:) but she's very happy, so I humbly consent. She says that she's going to send it to her dad who is overseas in Scotland. And then she casually asks if I would take more pictures of her, but she would pay me this time.

Orly? :innocent:

Nothing dirty (drat) since she's going to send them to her dad, but still, a shoot.

And this is the point where I divulge that, despite the fractals and digital in my gallery, my original intention when I joined dA was to eventually move to photography full-time.

When I sell a script or two and buy a pimped-out Alienware killing machine, than I'll also buy Cinema4D and all of its component extensions. I love Cinema4D. 3D artists know what I mean. When you open up Lightwave, or Max, or whatever you use, you can get lost in there. You look up and its six hours later... and you need just a little longer cuz that texture still doesn't look right. :P

But my main attraction is to photography. I've never liked the old adage "A picture is worth a thousand words". I hate that phrase. Why? Because a GOOD picture is only worth five words:

You had to be there.

A true picture captures what words cannot. It captures expressions, emotions, settings, locations. When words describe someone as simply "happy", you see that they're not JUST happy, they're... something else. And pictures capture that.

So yeah, I'm finally moving fully into photography. Not all the way there yet, but a lot closer.

I always knew I would, and I was pretty sure (if you can believe it) that it would be through a Coyote. I would take a good enough picture that they would ask for me to take more. And I always deliver when a woman asks for more. ;)


And lastly, Bianca.

Bianca by DJStrife

So... she's back from her surgery; she had breast implants. Note that the above thumb is an old pic; that is not Bianca after the implants. :|

And I saw her for the first time since the surgery last Friday, I believe.

We had talked a bunch before the surgery, chronicled in the journal Your Mom Goes to the 3-Year Anniversary, and I really soaked up everything she said.

So Friday she came on at 9, I came on at 7. I was going upstairs to grab beer and she was coming down to work the beer tub... and we said hi about 6 times, and then there were these awkward pauses between which small talk was made. I honestly didn't have a problem not staring at her new chest (since I'm not really a breast guy) even though she had implants of about 350 CCs, I think I heard on the grapevine. Anyways, I had missed her smile so that's what I was focusing on.

I don't know. With this girl, I just seem to do everything right.

Few months ago, she wore a wig to work just to be different, and I casually commented that she looked alot like Angelina Jolie, and she got all quiet, her mouth this wide grin.

"Dude! She's my fuckin' idol! I love her."

+10 points

And it really was just a regular compliment, I got lucky with the fact that she looked (from the side with the wig) like her favorite actress.

When I guessed that her favorite band was Deftones, I got lucky there, too.

+5 points

And then Friday while she was working the beer tub, I inquired if she was planning on seeing "Across the Universe". I had/have not seen it yet, but am a ridiculously huge fan of the Beatles and will see it and love it, regardless of what all those reviews say.

So when I asked Bianca and her face once again splashed on the same look as when I said she looked like Angelina, I knew I had struck gold.

+50 points

Apparently her wall back home is covered with Beatles things. She wants to Study Abroad so she can do the whole Beatles pilgramage too. And we talked for 2 hours about abbey road, strawberry field (memorial AND orphanage), our favorite songs, Yoko, "Across the Universe" and whether it will be good or not, and such.

And so when 20 minutes after we finished talking (I had to go stock beer) I came out from behind the bar with something behind my back, and revealed it to be the soundtrack for "Across the Universe" (yes, I bought the soundtrack before seeing the movie, but it's not like it gives the plot away), she was glad. She doesn't know if she's going to like to the movie, she confided, because she's not ready for it. She equates the Beatles with a certain previous guy-person who she really, really felt for and who crushed her heart, and she doesn't think she's ready to see it the movie yet because it will bring back memories. So I showed her the CD. She asked if I would play it for her after we closed, when we were all doing our cleaning duties, and of course consented.

Unfortunately (and yet fortunately), she got cut early because it was reedonkolously slow, so before she took off, I let her take home the soundtrack. I had figured on her wanting to take it home, so I brought along some extra CDs like I always do to play when we close. I listened to Coheed's "In Keeping Your Secrets" on the way to work, and was going to play a mix I had burned that morning (Adema, 30 Seconds to Mars, Deftones, Everclear, Coheed) for the closing work. Since I carry only CD jewel cases, I always combine two or three CDs in one case. So when I gave Bianca the "Across the Universe" soundtrack, I accidently left in the Coheed CD.

Stay tuned to see how the Coheed CD develops later in the story.

Another way I earned major points was through a certain video game.

Guitar Hero.

Because we are Coyote Ugly, a lot of the classic/nu/metal/country rock on our jukebox is also echoed on the Guitar Hero game. Yes, Coyote is a "country" bar by nature (as in David Allan Coe country :|), but we never go two nights in a row without hearing Korn, Rage, Metallica, Coal Chamber, Social Distortion, Crossfade, Bush, Soundgarden, Violent Femmes, Weezer, Joan Jett, Billy Idol, and more. And, naturally, some songs remind me of Guitar Hero, having no other person, place, or event for me to associate them with other than the game on which I rediscovered them.

So when one night, I don't remember the song, I walk over to Bianca by the beer tub and ask her if she has ever heard of Guitar Hero (one might be surprised how many people haven't), she once again got that just-won-the-lotto face. "I love that game!"

+20 points

Long story not-so-long, she confided that she had just receieved a PS2 but did not yet have the game. Well, yesterday, I brought it and set it up so we could play, after our shift was over, on the projection TV upstairs. I was doing a test run, checking the sound system, but playing one of my favorite songs, "Even Rats" by The Slip, and she walked upstairs along with one of the managers. :P

Well, I was no more than two minutes into the song when they walked upstairs, but they both stood there and watched the entire time til the song was over. :lol:

The manager, whose name is Tony, had the expression of someone who might have heard of GH in passing but had never actually seen it played. Bianca, having played naught but 4 or 5 songs total in her life, was enraptured by my near-perfect Expert :D (I fudged a few chords when I said something to Tony in the middle of the song).

Anyways, after the song, Tony was all, "You know I'm gonna have to ask you to take it down, right?"

"Even though my shift is over?"

"I'll talk to [the GM] about it." I guess his reasoning being that I usually get to night shifts hours early, and there wouldn't be much harm in me playing some games.

So I felt bad cuz I had to take it down (Tony thanked me doing so, I can only assume because I consented without throwing a tantrum, something the bartenders do quite often) and Bianca didn't get to play. :P It seemed kinda crap for her to agree to play, have me set it up, watch me play one song, and then me take it down again. Since I have all three games and two controllers, I let her borrow GH2, my memory card, and the corded controller. She was resistant, but I pointed out that, as had just been evidenced, I play GH enough as it is.

As I was disconnecting my PS2 from the projector, I casually asked Bianca if I had accidentally left my Coheed CD in the "Across the Universe" case.

"Yes! Oh my god, I hadn't heard them in forever. My roommate and I were jamming out to it last night."

+25 points

  • Listening to: The White Album
  • Reading: The Gunslinger - Stephen King
  • Watching: Family Guy vids on youtube
  • Playing: GH
  • Eating: my thoughts
  • Drinking: Strawberry-Kiwi Gatorade
by Beth Levine

It's Sunday night and the smell of Chinese food hangs low over the city. Two figures are poised outside of a neon-lit overpriced specialty food store.
     "Look, Joe, here's another one: 'Gormet Pastries,'" Lisa observes.
     "Don't these people have any respect for the law? Let's take him in," Joe sighs, exasperated.
     Joe pulls down on his snap brim hat. He and Lisa (and that's Lisa; not Leesa, Lysa, or Lise), a woman with determinedly clicking high heels, enter the aforementioned "Gormet Pastries."
     The owner, a member of the I-Dress-Only-In-Black-And-Not-Because-It's-Slimming tribe, eyes them disdainfully. "Can I help you?" he asks faintly.
     "Are you the proprietor of . . . Gourmet Pastries?" Lisa inquires, annoyed. This jerk can't spell and he's looking down on her?
     "Yes. Is there a problem?"
     The couple looks at each other meaningfully before whipping out their pocket-sized New Webster's Dictionaries.
     "Word police," Joe says with a penetrating stare. The owner turns pale, and his eyes start to dart around the store. Joe points to the back of the sign and sure enough, there is GORMET in all its purple shame. The owner pales. "I . . . uh . . . guess I never noticed," he stammers.
     "No, you people never do!" Joe exclaims. "Don't you ever proof things before shelling out your money? Day after day, you come in here and you never noticed a sign three feet high?"
     Lisa puts her hand on him. "Easy, Joe," she says quietly. Turning to the owner, she asks, "What's your name, buddy?"
     "Lonnee. L O N N . . ." He stops when he sees Joe and Lisa's faces turn pale. They are looking at a sign behind the counter that reads Baking Done on Premise.
     "What is that?" Joe asks curtly. "You bake with the hope that it might come out right?" Lonnee looks confused, as Joe begins to tie two copies of The Chicago Manual of Style to Lonnee's wrists. The three begin to shuffle to the door, while Lisa reads him his rights.
     "You have the right to remain silent--something we prefer, actually. You have the right to remain literate. In the absence of this ability, you have the right to an English professor, which the court will provide."
     Lonnee raises his head in defiance. "Ha! I just catered an affair for Edwin Newman; he'll defend me! He owes me!"
     "I don't think so. The man has principles--and that's ples not pals," snaps Joe. He sadly shakes his head and looks at Lisa. "Pathetic, isn't it?"
     As they pass, the customers of the soon-to-be-named Gourmet Pastries watch in open-mouthed horror. "He seemed to pay such attention to details. Who knew?" says one.
     A mother looks down at her ashen-faced 10-year-old son. "See, sonny? He probably cheated his way through spelling class, too. Thought he could get away with it. See? It always catches up to you." The boy burst into tears. (When he grows up, he will produce an Academy Award-winning documentary on his experiences, "Scared Grammatical.")
     Later, Joe and Lisa emerge from the New York Public Library as the former owner of Gormet Pastries is bundled off into a library bus.
     "What a dope," says Joe. "I'm glad they threw the book at him, not that he could read it. Imagine--dragging Edwin Newman's name into it!"
     "Let's go get a cup of coffee," says Lisa. She takes Joe's arm, and they proceed to Bagels 'N Stuff. Joe balks when he sees the sign.
     Lisa reassures him, "Well, it's a little cutesy, but I think colloquially it's correct." Joe stares at her intently as they enter the restaurant.
     Ten minutes later, the two are relaxing in a booth.
     "How'd you get into this crazy business, Joe?" Lisa asks meditatively.
     "I started as a copy editor at a book publisher. I loved the job, but then to save money, the publisher . . . " Lisa leans over and pats his hand. Joe bravely continues, "The publisher started allowing books to go to press with Britishisms intact so they wouldn't have to spend money to reset type. Colour instead of color, that sort of thing. I said no. This far I will bend and no further.
     "Turns out my boss used to work for McDonald's and was the one responsible for 'Over 5 billion sold,' not even knowing it should be 'More than 5 billion.' He was that sloppy. So he fired me! That's when I realized my true vocation: Cleaning up this ungrammatical city of ours."
     Lisa sighs. "Sometimes I wonder if it really does matter."
     Joe spills his coffee. "What? How can you possibly say that?"
     "Oh, more than, over. Gourmet with or without a u, does it really amount to," she pauses before uttering the cliché, "a hill of beans?"
     Now it's Joe's turn to reach for her hand. Don't burn out on me now, baby. It happens to others, but not to us. It's in our blood."
     Lisa's eyes well up. "I can't take it anymore. Everywhere I go--the bank, the sandwich shops, dry cleaners--there are typos everywhere. I went to buy a co-op, but when I saw the awning said 'Two Fourty,' I couldn't do it. I have no friends, because I'm always correcting them. Countermen hate me , because I'm forever pointing out that it's iced tea, not ice tea. And don't even talk to me about apostrophes; they show up everywhere but where they are supposed to. Joe," Lisa's tears spill out, "I want to be like other people. I want to be sloppy."
     Joe takes his hand away. "But we can't be like other people. We're a breed. The Word Police. If we slip, it's the end of the civilized world, the demise of the society of Safire and Newman and Webster. It means the Lonnees and McDonald's of the world win."
     Restlessly, Joe taps the end of his pencil on the tabletop. "Language defines what we can think," he continues. "I believe undisciplined, careless writing makes for undisciplined, careless thinking. How can you formulate ideas without appropriate tools--clarity, attention to detail? Without them, the world's thinking becomes muddled and uninformed. The mind is a muscle. Use it or lose it."
     "We could go away, Joe," Lisa says plaintively through her sobs. "We could go to France. We don't speak French, so we'd never know when something was incorrect."
     "Sorry, Lisa, I can't turn my back on murderers of the mother tongue. I need the facts, ma'am." Joe gives Lisa a despairing look, and then throws a dollar on the table. Coat collar up, hat brim pulled down, he sadly leaves Lisa and Bagels 'N Stuff behind, but not before pointing out to the amazed proprietor that decaffeinated has two Fs in it.
     "I'll let you off with a warning this time," he says, exiting to chase a passing exterminator's truck with MICES, TERMITES AND ROACHES written on the side.
     Back at the table, Lisa watches him go and says softly to herself, "I'll miss ya, Joe. Paris would of been swell." She shudders after mouthing the foul words of her new world. Picking up her decafeinated coffee, she drinks the bitter cup.

Your Mom Goes to the Lonestar Cafe

Journal Entry: Wed Aug 22, 2007, 10:30 PM

I'm for serious...

I have found the best meatloaf in the world.

To be honest, I've never been a fan of meatloaf. I remember parents cooking it when I was a child, and I had to choke it down with gallons of ketchup. Never a fan.

Day before yesterday, I went flyering with Lindsay, but she didn't want to actually go flyering. Instead, she wanted some "really kickass meatloaf", so we went to this place down the street, ordered it to go (I took a chance and ordered some as well), and then stood outside. Usually after ordering food we head back, but Lindsay didn't want to eat at the bar. Eating in the park (she particularly enjoyed using the word "picnic") came up, but the lack of drinks led us to eat on the patio at Starbucks down the street. The weather was beautiful, the meatloaf… was the best I'd ever had. Needed no ketchup whatsoever. It was so good… I teared up when I put the first bite into my mouth. I stopped chewing, looked down at the meatloaf, and said, "Wow." Omg, it was good. Not only the best meatloaf I've ever had, but also some of the best food overall I've ever had.

We topped that off with some chocolate chip banana cake/bread from Starbucks, and some drinks from there as well.

What a great meal.

The best meal I've had in a long, long time.

Why the best meal I've had in a long time? Because all I've eaten for the last 6 weeks has been Subway and Taco Cabana.

To catch people up on why I've been so regrettably absent on my beloved site, two of the seven barbacks were let go about 6 weeks ago. One let go because he touched a customer's leg while she was on the bar (and her boyfriend complained) and because he was caught trying to take pictures with the company camera up customers' skirts while they were dancing on the bar. So… yeah, he was kind of an idiot.

The other guy got let go because he asked to work a solo shift instead of it being me AND him, and the manager and I said it was okay, but then the guy didn't show up til almost an hour past when he was supposed to be there. So yeah… let go.

And while five barbacks might seem like a lot, it's not. One of them's an asst. manager so he'll only work two AM shifts barbacking, the rest of his shifts as managing. Another guy only works one or two AM shifts barbacking as well since his other shifts he spends as the in-house maintenance guy, fixing doors, drawers, and whores.

Lawl. :P

What a great tagline. Doors, drawers and whores.

Anyways. There end up being even more shifts because the third barback is an idiot (though he's getting better ever since I cussed him out on the patio for leaving the bar in a shit-state for me.) He'll work AM shift, I'll work PM, and I'll get there and start checking to see if he's stocked everything he's supposed to, and the PM shift girls will come downstairs. All they know when they walk behind the bar is that there are two barbacks standing there: one is leaving, one is coming on. So when they turn to me and ask, "Are you coming on or leaving?" And I say, "Coming on," and they say, "Good," I take that to mean I'm better at my job than the douche-barback. And lastly the fourth guy is okay (since he's new) but almost all of the bartenders hate him: "I think his I'm-right-behind-you box is broken."

So… lots of shifts for me.

Don't worry, dA, I'm not ignoring you. Daddy's been working a lot lately. I haven't had time for any other websites or friends either. :petting:


Buffalo Burger ftw!!

I did find this ONE site:

Check it out. :D

Local (for me), prices aren't bad…

Anyone wanna go halfsies on some kangaroo burgers? Maybe a whole rattlesnake? Some crocodile? :3

I will definitely be ordering from this place soon, and so should you. :lol:

As an afterthought, look at the 38 different choices of meats. Though I have no doubt lemontea would find it blasphemy, you can order llama!! :lol:


Bring It, Suckas…

So, I haven't been on it in a good long while, but I feel this is the time to plug my xbox live account: FinalStrife7. Feel free to add me if you has one as well. It's my roomie's xbox, so we share. I can play Call of Duty 2, Halo 2, Rainbow Six: Vegas, and Gears of War, though I only just recently started Gears of War and do in fact suck. I have no doubt a chinchilla on speed could do better than I at Gears. At COD or Rainbow Six, though, I'm pretty good, so meet me in the streets at noon, sucka. >:3

You know…

There's not much else to report. I've been working the entire length of my absence nonstop, so… nothing else has really happened. I still love my girls and we all have fun. During the day shifts we play Jenga and such, and during the night shifts we have water fights.

I know I missed dA's birthday (happy belated, Fella). I was at work when the stroke hit the midnight. :(

More pictures to come. Got a whole bunch, now.

Finished the second draft of a script, started a concept for another.

Oh! One more interesting thing.

We had our employee evaluations at Coyote a week or so ago.

They called me in to the office, it was the GM, the barback manager, and the two asst. managers (one of whom is new and didn't know me, but he's cool, I've come to find). Shawna (the GM) started by saying that she really didn't have anything bad to say. I'm one of the few people that works at Coyote who doesn't complain, which she really appreciated. I'm good at taking orders, if a bartender is out of Heineken, I go and get it right away. I'm on time. She said I get along great with everybody, she's never seen me yell at a customer (which I haven't.)

And then, Shawna said something to the effect of, "As you know, Coyote is a very rapidly expanding company, and we would like to help you down any avenue you choose to pursue within the company, but if this is only a part-time job, that's fine as well."

Do I smell "asst. manager"? :excited:

I know I won't be for a long time. They actually did a hiring run about 2-3 months ago for asst. managers, which is when they moved up the now-barback manager. He used to be only a barback but he's been with the company long enough that they bumped him up. Some of the bartenders too got bumped up to "lead bartenders" and they sometimes train on semi-asst. manager shifts. So they won't be looking for anyone for a while, but it's nice to know that I'm a candidate and that the higher-ups are rooting for me. Nice to know that they're letting me know there's a door there when the time comes, so to speak.

Again, though, it might be a while. Even if the position were to open up, barbacks easily make more than asst. managers. I has an lifestyle to maintain, so I can't accept a full-time managing position. :P

But yeah… so, that's about all that's happened.

Pics to come, of course.

Love you all.

Stay deviant.


  • Listening to: Scrubs playing in the other room
  • Reading: The Writer's Handbook: 1998 Edition
  • Watching: nothing
  • Playing: Fable
  • Eating: Subway :/
  • Drinking: Cranberry Apple Juice

Your Mom Goes to the 3-Year Anniversary

Journal Entry: Sun Jul 8, 2007, 7:16 PM

So, yeah...

So here I am.


Been a weird last few days, though I’m not sure why.

I’m almost done with my site reconstruction, and by almost done I mean "almost done with the main page". :|

In an interesting aside, while I was editing my site’s main page, I noticed that the world "simply" has the word "imply" within it. I thought that was interesting. :paranoid:


One of the former-bouncers at CUS is this guy named Cody. He’s still with the company, he’s just taking an extended break because he’s in the show at Six Flags: Fiesta Texas, this year, the show called Xcelleration.

Wikipedia has this to say:
In 2006, Xcelleration, a show featuring professionals from the sports of BMX Biking, skateboarding, bungee artists and acrobatics was opened at the Zaragoza Theater. Xcelleration was also awarded an industry accolade, the Big "E" for "Best Sports Show of 2005."

Cody, back when he was still working at CUS, saw me shooting one day with my Canon and asked if I wouldn’t mind shooting him riding his bike (bmx). A month later, I finally had an opportunity (about a week and a half ago). He got me backstage before the show started and I did the best I could with the lighting I was given. :hmm:

Got some good pics.

I didn’t see any of my old stage managers or anything, but Cody and I are planning on another day I might go back and shoot some more, so it’s not too late. :paranoid: I used to work at Six Flags: Fiesta Texas as a sound technician. I worked at Sangerfest Halle and ran sound/lights/computers. :D I also ran sound for a young Haley Scarnato. *shines knuckles* Back in the day. Anyways, it’ll be interesting to tour the park and see who still works there.

One Lump or Two?

Back when I was a kid, my mom used to listen to a lot of classic rock. And I picked up on that. I specifically remember one day, years and years ago when I was about 10, where I started talking to my mom about The Scorpions, and she stopped me with this skeptical look and asked, "How do you know who The Scorpions are?" And I said, "Because you listen to them…" :paranoid:

Anywho, there’s the song, "Pour Some Sugar On Me" by Def Leppard. Great song. My mom was a big Def Leppard fan. I remember the first time I ever heard them, I put on their Pyromania album. Instant love. But in their song "Pour Some Sugar On Me", there’s the transition to the bridge where Joe Elliot (lead singer) sings, "Do you take sugar? One lump or two?"

I don’t remember what I used to think the first part was, but when I was a kid (before you could look up the lyrics on the internets) I used to think the second part was, "One more for show".

It’s just funny what I/we/you used to come up with. I specifically remember my mom asking my sister and I, as we were driving down the road, what we were saying. And we would relate back to her some jibberish or consonants and vowels that wasn’t even remotely English, and she would bust up laughing. My sister and I just liked the songs, so any songs we didn’t know the words to we mimicked.

Good times, good times.

I just think about that at work every time "Sugar" comes on, and since it’s one of the mandatory choreographed dances, I hear it about two times a day, maybe more, maybe less.

…And My Money On My Mind

So I would like to take this opportunity to once again thank rapidograph for the prints. I always knew the movie Snatch would come through for me one day.

The reason I bring this back up is because I finally bought frames a week ago! I finally got a chance to head down to the local craft store and pick some up. Having never shopped for frames before, it was a very enlightening experience. :P

I got my roommate to take me, and when we got there we headed straight back to the frames. We looked around through the aisles of frames for a bit and I came to a few conclusions. The biggest of which was that there were no 10"x15" frames. :| There were 10"x14", 11"x17", 12"X16" and more, but no 10"x15". Also, I needed two 8"x8" frames, and there were some in the store, but they had that matte frame on them reducing the actual viewing area to 5"x5".

I messed with the 8"x8" frames and found out the matte could lift out, so I had those. The 9"x12" was easy enough, as was the 5"x7". But I still couldn’t find any 10"x15". :(

So I went up to the front counter and asked a lady if they had any (maybe I was just not seeing them), and she said no, but that if I wanted, I could head back to the custom framing counter and she would page someone over.

That’s fine. I walked all the way back over to the frame department and waited at the counter, and sure enough some sorta-foxy girl shows up. We talked about what I wanted and what style and stuff. After typing on her computer, she said that 10"x15" frames started as low as $142. Each. :|

I think she sensed my surprise because she led me over to another section of the frames department and showed me these cheaper construct-them-yourself frames, but then she added that the glass and backing for a 10"x15" would have to be shipped in custom and would run about $50 each just for the glass and backing. :ohmygod:

So I thanked her for her time, settled on a pair of 11"x17" frames (I needed two), and those both work awesome. I’ve finished framing everything so now you guys can see the awesome prints rapidograph got me. :D

So awesome. I love this place.

Here’s a thumb to the scrap of my final framed deviations: :D

Way Past Due

And now I finally get to recount the Texas/Austin DevMeet! :#1: It happened how long ago? :P This is what REALLY happened.

So, the morning of, I get woken up by lemontea letting me know he’s about 20 minutes from me, so I get up and get ready. I get dressed, pack my backpack, and wait. He arrives. We meet face-to-face for the first time, I do one last run through of my room to make sure I didn’t forget anything. All good, we leave and climb into his mustang. We head down to the Tigermart real quick before we get on the highway to pickup gas for him (he drove from Midland to San Antonio, a 5-6 hour drive) and some breakfast for me. Gas station-hotdog and a liter of chocolate milk! :#1: Breakfast of champions.

We talked a lot on the way to Austin, listened to music, bassed out to some gangsta rap. Repped our block, the usual.

The funny thing about our trip was that we, basically, took one left. :|

After leaving the Tigermart, we headed North on Interstate 35, right? North, and north, and more north, and next thing we knew we were in Austin. We pulled off the highway at 15th street, took a LEFT, and then went straight til we hit Lake Austin. Our entire trip was one left. :3

Oh, and there was no traffic. :unimpressed: This was about 11:30 in the morning, I believe, and there was no one anywhere. We’re thinking that the news station truck we saw is what those Austin-ites meant by traffic. :roll:

Anyway. :P

We ended up being grotesquely early thanks to the "traffic", so we waited. We waited in Mozart’s Café for a very long time. After about 45 minutes, this one lone guy kinda wanders up and asks something about deviantART, and sure enough he was a deviant: asoldier.

We talked about guy stuff for a while, coding and photography and the site and what we thought the new online language of the future was going to be and stuff. Was interesting. We still had an hour left, though, so we gathered our things and wandered over to the Hula Hut next door. The only seating was at the 5-person bar so we sat. :lol: I had a fishbowl of some tropical punch thing that was like their variation of a Mai-Tai. lemontea and asoldier had quesadillas. We talked about random things, some with our bartender, who looked a lot like Topher Grace. :| A lot.

We finished up there and went back over to Mozart’s to chill. Waited inside for a while. 20 minutes after people were supposed to be there, we were kind getting a bit bummed. :| I looked up StJoan’s journal on my phone and she sure enough said that she was coming. I didn’t know who else was planning on coming though, so it was limited. We decided to patrol the patio outside and see if there was anyone waiting out there. Sure enough, caveatLECTOR, PinkyMcCoversong, and jake10684 were all outside. lemontea, asoldier and I relocated outside and we waited. Everyone was introduced as more and more people showed up. We all got nametags.

Lots of mingling.

Lots of pictures and photos. We must have been there for a good couple of hours before it started to sprinkle, so we all (about 25 of us) decided to go inside. Upon going inside, we realized there wasn’t enough room so we all decided to go next door to Hula Hut. Upon going to Hula Hut and talking to the hostess, I found out the wait for a party of four was about an hour. A party of 25 was going to be a tad longer. :|

So we all stood there in the rain trying to figure out where to go. Suggestions of Taco Cabana and Rudy’s and "back to Mozart’s" and such were all made. pgraves piped up (in RA mode) and suggested we all at least move over near Mozart’s where a large canopy would keep us all out of the rain.

Props to pgraves. :P

It was then decided upon to go to Rudy’s BBQ.

We all agreed on rides to take as few cars as possible and we agreed to line-up in front of Hula Hut on the shoulder of the road, and that kaujot, with his bright yellow car (and knowledge of Austin), would lead the way to Rudy’s. So it’s lemontea, hazelarmadillo and me in lemontea’s Mustang and we’re in the queue waiting on the side of the road, and StJoan’s boyfriend comes walking down the line informing each of the cars that kaujot and his bright yellow car had mistaken some other random line of people for us and taken off without us. Fortunately, he was coming back. :P

After coming back, our train of 12 or so cars all took off. We needed to u-turn so we turned left down this side-street, and then we needed to turn left again. The trouble happened in that the second left was at a light. And the first half of people in the train, oblivious to the people in the last half, took their time turning and the last half of us got stuck by the light when it changed back to red. :lol:


So after the light changes, the last half of us somehow managed to find our way to the highway and zip up the line and fall back in with the train. That yellow car really was a good idea. It was the only yellow one on the road.

At one point, barely able to see the yellow car, lemontea decided "Fuck this" and pulled out of the line. :lol: He goes barreling up the fast lane, bypasses 8 of the 9 cars in front of us, and pulls back in the line 30 feet behind the lead yellow car. :lmao: Was funny. Shoot, we weren’t gonna get left at a light again.

We all ended up at Rudy’s BBQ. Had a good time. After a time, about 10 of us split off to go back to StJoan’s cousin’s house.

That was another travel train but, with only 5 cars to worry about, went a lot smoother. zanenkim got held at a light at one point, but we saw it immediately and pulled over on the shoulder til he caught up.

When we finally got to the house, we all sat in the living room and chilled, talking about everything from deviantART to speeding tickets to World of Warcraft. :lol: Was very fun.

le douche :lmao:

But yeah. In the end, lemontea had to puss out and said we needed to go, so we departed. Said goodbyes all around. Made informal agreements to definitely do this again (August it is). lemontea got directions back to IH-35 and zanenkim followed us til we split.

When lemontea and I got back to my place, we played some Guitar Hero for a bit before hitting the hay. Next morning he left before I woke up (I was exhausted).

Next meet is planned for August. Down here in San Antonio. :P

Can’t wait.


So I originally had a completely different beginning to this journal when I tried banging it out a week ago. (Un)fortunately, a lot can happen 10 days. :|

So much has happened, it’s insane. I’ve worked the last six days straight. I have acquired about 52 hours of work this week alone. For those who have found my page through the Random Deviant link, or whatever, I work at Coyote Ugly in San Antonio. Since we have no elevator, the last week has been 52 hours of running up and down stairs all day. 160 lb kegs, towels, trashcans, buckets of ice, beer and liquor. Everyday I worked this week, my shirt was soaked with sweat within 30 minutes of coming on. Since it usually takes about an hour and a half for my shirt to get soaked, you can tell it was busy. One of the reasons it was busy was because Thursday was the three year anniversary of the opening of the San Antonio Coyote Ugly Saloon. Lots of coming on early and cleaning and stuff for the few days before.

The day of the three year anniversary was murder. I came on at six and the "new guy" came on at seven. I’d worked with him almost all of his training shifts, but his first off-training shift was the night of the three year anniversary. :|

A lot of working anywhere is just reaction and knowledge, both acquired simply through simple cognizance and time. When I hear the characteristic clink of a bartender using her bar key to scratch the TABC sticker off a bottle of Absolut Mandarin she just emptied, before she finishes scratching off that sticker, I need to look down the line, see what she needs, go right to the vodka cabinet in the middle of the bar, pull out another Mandarin without looking, pull off the plastic, uncap it, and trade it out so she can finish making the drink she was making. It’s just reaction. And J (the new guy) just kinda got the ill luck of having to work the third anniversary for his first off-training shift.


Apparently someone in upper management had the bright idea to turn the upstairs VIP section into an actual reservation-only VIP section. Call ahead the day before, get on the list, and you can go up. Why would you wanna do this? Because the same person in upper management also had the bright idea to make the upstairs bar an OPEN bar. :lol:

From 7 to 9 pm, it was chaos. The length of the upstairs bar is short enough that 5 or 6 people could lay on it head-to-foot. This may not seem like much, but it wasn’t near big enough for all the people who wanted free drinks. And considering the main down-stairs bar could probably fit about 26+ people head-to-foot, there’s a significant size difference.

Anways, J tried to handle the upstairs bar as best he could (on the condition that we could switch every hour, "or something"), but after my first hour ended (which was after his first hour), I just stayed up there. It was a madhouse and he hadn’t handled it very well his first hour. That’s not a slight on him, it’s just something he’ll have to grow into like I did. But yeah. That open bar thing was fun. At one point I noticed my arms had stopped sweating and my mouth was dry, so I went down, chugged two 32 oz Gatorades, and went back up. Gotta fight that dehydration before it starts.

It was crazy.

But fun.

And there were a ton of people from corporate there, too, including Lilliana Lovell, the founder of the first Coyote Ugly in New York and the current CEO of everything Coyote-related. I heard she was short, but godDAMN is she short. I shit you not, she couldn’t have been more than 5 feet tall. Fine as hell, though. 40 years old with a kid? Yeah, she was hot. J and I both happened to be downstairs near to where Lil was talking and drinking with our GM and we both kind of paused to look at Lil, and J uttered the epitomic guy compliment: "She’s fuckin hot. I’d tap that." And she really was very beautiful.

And Jacqui was there, too. For those who haven’t watched the show, Jacqui Squatriglia is the original choreographer who designed all of the signature dances you’ll see bartenders perform on the bar. Copyrighted by Jacqui herself. The day before the 3-year anniversary, Jacqui and Lil flew down from New York and Jacqui taught all of my Coyotes a new dance (to Tom Jones’ "Sex Bomb"). And the girls learned it. Well enough that Jacqui’s response was, "Well, it wasn’t terrible."

Apparently that’s one of the highest compliments Jacqui can pay you. :lol: And if you’ve ever watched the show, I believe it. Jacqui is not one to dole out praise often, so that she said it wasn’t terrible is a huge compliment.

In an interesting aside, Jacqui was kinda loopy the day before the 3-year. Upon asking Shawna (my GM) why, I was treated to the fact that Jacqui hates to fly. Hates. Apparently she tokes up on SOMEthing before she hits the skies because she hates flying so much. Hence the loopiness. Shawna also informed all of us listening, though, that the San Antonio Coyote Ugly is the ONLY one that Jacqui will personally fly to, because she loves it so much. The only other time she’ll fly to a CUS (Coyote Ugly Saloon) is for a Grand Opening. Any anniversary for any other CUS, she sends one of her Dance Captains, but for San Antonio, she’s willing to come herself. :P That’s awesome. Also, apparently the Coyotes at other bars really don’t know how to dance. O_o Just some information coming down the line from people who have been to other Coyotes. :paranoid:

And Shawna said that Lil admitted the San Antonio one was her favorite one as well.

I do what I can. :P

No, but really, the downside to working the 3-year anniversary (which, in all fairness, I did ask to work) was that I never got to officially meet Lil, Jacqui, or anyone else from corporate. :( Next year, I hope.

Definitely an interesting experience.

Especially since ALL of the bartenders had to be there most of the time, though only a few of them were actually working. Some of those girls got wasted!! Dancing on tables, trying to lick the ice sculpture, yelling out Chappelle Show quotes, falling down, crying… :o Wow. Apparently at one point in the night, Jenn turned to Charissa and asked, "What did the five fingers say to the hand? SLAP!" And then Jenn actually slapped Charissa. :lmao:

Jenn on the left, Charissa on the right:

Jenn was off her ass so I don’t think she knew what was really going on or what she was doing, but Charissa started crying cuz she thought she was slapped maliciously. But then she thought that Karen was the one who had slapped her. :lol: So Charissa finally manages to stagger over to the bar and slaps Karen in "revenge". :lmao: Poor Karen had no clue what the hell was going on.


Though, to be honest, I don’t think she really remembered by the end of the night anyways. She ended up getting toasted off her ass as well. After all was said and done, we’re all in the office counting money and recounting the night, and a very-drunk Karen turns to J and informs him to watch out because he’s got a bunch of the bartenders all hot for him. :lol: And Shawna throws in that Karen’s one of them.

Well, Karen of course had to correct Shawna and begins to inform the entire office that she is in fact a voyeur. :lmao: I think Karen was talking only to Shawna, but for how loud she was talking, the 6 security, the assistant manager, the 4 other bartenders left over, and I could all hear fine. :lol: Besides, as Karen continued to slur-lecture to us all, "fraternizing is bidden". :lmao: She meant to say FORbidden, but out of this one long slew of words, the longest one (fraternizing) was the one she got right.

Needless to say, Shawna took Karen’s keys away. :P

I was really focused on doing my job the night of the 3-year anniversary, but I specifically remember a bartender (I don't remember who) saying on the microphone to the bar, "If boobs were airplanes, my mouth would be an airport." :lmao:

So it was a very interesting night.

Almost as interesting as LAST night. :|

Last night, I get to CUS at 5pm to chill. I’ve recently acquired the WEP key for the wireless there and I planned on using it to work a bit on some writing projects I keep having to put off. Well, I walk out of the bathroom at 6:15 and there’s the day barback, Gabe.

I’m not a fan of Gabe. The first time he ever spoke to me, he was very condescending. I don’t take condescension well. To put it bluntly, he simply doesn’t care. He works 1-2 shifts a week and tries to get those off as often as possible. And when he does work, he does as little as possible.

So he meets me as I come out of the bathroom at 6:15 and he starts running through this list of everything he hasn’t done.

I interrupt him and say, "Then do it. I don’t come on til 7." Point blank. I gave up being cordial a long time ago with this guy.


I wanted to slap the guy. 7. After 6, before 8. He goes to the schedule (which coincidentally for me was no more than 6 feet away) and looks at it. Oh, big surprise. He’s scheduled to get off at 7, which is when I come on. 45 more minutes. He says he needs to get off, though, so I noncommittally say I’ll come on.

He leaves. I curse him. He left a shit load more than he said. He filled up the beer tub with beer, but he didn’t put ANY ice on it, so it’s all getting warm. 2 of the 4 ice wells behind the bar were completely empty. The bartenders were VERY low on 7 different beers (and completely out of others), and the Shiner keg had blown. When Richard, the head barback came downstairs, I made sure to casually mention that I needed my clock-in time adjusted to account for the 45 minutes I came on early. I had remedied the other 2 ice wells and the beer, but I made sure to point out the still-completely empty ones and a list of what Gabe had forgotten. Richard gave me some of Gabe’s tipout for having to deal with his shit, but that’s not quite what I was looking for. An extra $15 isn’t my idea of justice, I want the prick written up or fired. I love my job and I’m damn good at it, and I don’t need some ass-clown fucking up my night with his indifference.

And that kind of ruined the first part of my night (last night). By 8:30 I honest-to-god felt like knocking somebody the fuck out. :unimpressed: I was pissed. Everything Gabe had left for me had left me behind when I came on. I didn’t get any farther behind than that, but I shouldn’t have been behind in the first place. I should be able to come on and have everything ready to go; I shouldn’t have to spend the rest of my shift on a scavenger hunt trying to figure out what else Gabe didn’t do. And that set me off for the first 5 or so hours of work. Even after Robert (another barback) came in 45 minutes late (9:45) and helped round off everything I couldn’t catch up on, I was still pissed. Robert’s something unto himself, but whatever.

When I’m stocking beer behind the bar, I set the case up on the edge of the bar so that it’s not on top of the cooler I’m stocking. And sometimes people jokingly pretend to take either the case or a beer from the case, and I usually pretend to laugh and stuff. Someone pretending to take a beer kind of got old after the 100th time, but everyone honestly thinks they’re original so I try and play along. Not last night. Some guy put a finger on a Heineken and waited til I looked up, and I fixed him with this stare that wiped that grin of his off his face. If I hadn’t been so pissed, I would have laughed for how quick that grin left his face. It was like something from a movie. As it were, I didn’t laugh. Last night was just not the night for funny.

You can tell the night’s not going my way when I don’t sing. Of all the songs that come on the jukebox, I love to sing. Was in choir for 8 years of my life. So when I’m not in the mood to sing, I’m not in the mood to do much else.

Right around 10:30, I was standing in the corner near the ice machine just absently watching the crowd when Dawn walked over.

This is Dawn :below:

She, along with some of the other bartenders and security, had asked me during the course of the night if I was all right (when I’m upset, it’s pretty obvious) and I kept shrugging everyone off saying that I was. I very rarely admit it, preferring to let the anger run its course. At the very least, it fuels me to do my job better. Being angry gives me a boost in my energy to run up stairs faster, carry more things, and focus more. Making a larger-than-normal effort to ignore customers and get my job done lets me zero in on things I need to do. Earlier in the night, I had passed Dawn as she was taking a smoke break in the ice room and she said, "Are you all right? Take a breather." And I just said, "I’m fine." And kept going. :paranoid:

So at 10:30 when she walked up to me and out of nowhere gave me a kiss on the cheek, I was pleasantly surprised.

Darryl, one of the bouncers, was standing right there and he made some comment about how if he had gotten a kiss from Dawn, it would have made his night. And Dawn told Darryl I wasn’t having a good night and gave me a hug. And then another kiss on the cheek. :love:

And I started singing again.

I’d had 4 Gatorades, 3 Monsters, a Sobe NoFear, and a 40 oz Coke over the course of the night up to that point, so I was able to maintain my focus though my anger had all but dissipated. And I had just popped 4 more Advil liquid-gel caps and three more Creatine capsules, so I wasn’t going to fatigue for the rest of the night.

My night was infinitely better after that.

Dawn’s my homegirl.

At the end of the night (this morning, rather), Robert and I finished cleaning and the bartenders went upstairs to count money but I stayed on the bar. Robert had lain down on three stools and was trying to sleep, so it was just me and Bianca. She had wandered over and I patted the bar, so she jumped up and sat next to me.


And we talked.

Bianca and I have always gotten along really well. Even during the course of yesterday (after Dawn cheered me up), Bianca and I talked a lot. Whenever she works beer tub, I’ll set her up. And sitting on the bar, we spent the next 45 minutes talking about her boots (looking much older, in her opinion, from the water-fight we’d had the week before), feline leukemia (she called it "kitty leukemia" :P), Fruity Pebbles, doing the puzzles on the back of the Fruity Pebbles box, Bianca being a bouncer, and more. Was a lot of fun. Lots of new inside jokes made. :3

She was only half-serious when she said she wanted to be a bouncer, but we still joked about her muscles and stuff. She was being all faux-serious, flexing and inviting us all to the gun show, and stuff. :lmao: Bianca tried being all hard and badass when Melanie, another of the servers, walked past and Melanie busted up laughing saying it was one of the cutest things she’d ever seen. :lmao: There’s this hilarious picture on the second floor of Bianca standing on the bar flexing as hard as possible, and I have to admit it’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen. The look of comical strain on her face, combined with her scrawny arms makes for one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

Poor Bianca.

I told Bianca I would put in a good word with Shawna. "Don’t let her size, or small figure, or quiet voice fool you. Bianca is badass. She’s so ripped, she has a six-pack on her forehead." :lol:

Bianca confessed she practiced in front of the mirror all the time. "What, you wanna start somethin’? You got something to say to me? Let’s take this outside." :lmao: She’s such a nerd.

Was funny.

So that was a great cap to the week.

I love that place.

1 or 2 of the people who work there can suck a left nut, but everyone else is awesome.


  • Listening to: Shakira/JoJo/Massive Attack/Gin Blossoms
  • Reading: Some psychology magazine
  • Watching: Simone
  • Playing: FFXII
  • Eating: Taco Cabana
  • Drinking: Apple Juice (From Concentrate)

Your Mom Goes to the Texas devMeet

Journal Entry: Thu Jun 21, 2007, 2:58 PM

Don't Look At Me Like That

First thing I thought this morning when I woke up was that I needed to quit falling back to sleep and actually get up.

Second thing I thought, as I'm lying there awake in bed, is, "I wonder if you can rack a monkey in the nuts?" I don't know why I thought of that. I haven't been racked (or seen someone racked) in years. I don't know any monkeys either. Anywho, I wonder how one goes about getting the funding to test that. I wonder what government grants one can acquire for "Testing the Effects of Gonad Trauma in Primates". :3 I wonder what the classified ad would look like for that. I mean, can you even use regular people or do you need qualified animal handlers? (:lmao: Animal "handlers") I know trained professionals can be a tad expensive, so I would personally want to use common people off the street, though I would of course have to make them sign a waiver attesting that I'm not liable for anything the monkey does after the person racks it.

That would indeed be interesting. :plotting:

Wally-World Relapse

So the other day I was commenting in the presence of my roommates that we needed a new board game. We don't collectively have many to start with and I know board games are a good way to "break the ice" between people. I don't like my roommates, but I'm making an effort to make things easier.

After suggesting we should get a new board game, my sister's semi-best friend suggested we go to Walmart. :| In truth it was the only thing still open, but when she mentioned it I did a small personal flashback to the last time I went to Walmart. For those who don't remember (and couldn't be bothered to click the link), I went in with the intent of buying a card reader, and I walked out carrying not only a card reader but also a giant bag of tater tots, a Hannah Montana dvd, and two of the nasty-tasting Steven Seagal drinks. :| So forgive me if I'm wary next time I go to Walmart.

Well, we ended up going, and in addition to buying SceneIt: Disney (which I pwned at :3), I ended up buying two packs of Uno (which isn't so bad), a Hello Kitty PEZ dispenser and some candy, and a Tamagotchi. :lol:

Now for the bad news. After only two days, I killed my Tamagotchi. :|

It's harder than I remember. :paranoid:

To be honest, I set the clock wrong. It was accurate according to the timezone I live in, but it was not conducive to my lifestyle. :innocent: I wake up anywhere from 2 to 5pm not because I'm lazy but because I don't get out of work til at least 3:30am and don't get to bed until about 4 to 6 in the morning. My Tamagotchi (who I named "Lucky". Funny how well that name served him. :lmao:) would be asleep by 11pm and awake really early. To be honest, I don't know what time he woke up since it was always before me. Let's assume he woke up at about 9am and went nighty-night at 11pm. If so, he had a 14-hour window where I could feed and play with him. If I woke up everyday at the bright-and-early hour of 2pm, this reduced the window from 14 hours to 9 hours. Factor in that I can't really be seen at work busting out with a Tamagotchi, and I didn't have much time.

Bouncer: "Dude, whatchu got there?"

Me: "Nothing." :paranoid:

Bouncer: "Come on, you can tell me. What do you have?"

Me: "Nothing, go away."

Bouncer: "..."

Me: "..."

Bouncer: "..."

Me: "...His name's Lucky."

Bouncer: "That's cool. Mine's named 'Marsha'."

Me: :o

I'd rather avoid as many unpleasant situations as possible, unowutimeen?

While it's the bouncers' job to keep the customers in line, I can "offer advice" every now and then if need be.

/me sets down 4 cases of beer.

Me: "Hey, would you stop standing on the stool, please? :| Excuse me, ma'am. Please keep your beer more towards the edge of the bar so it won't get kicked over by one of the bartenders. Sir, would you ple-- Hold on, my Tamagotchi's paging me. :P"

/me whips out plastic egg-shaped thingy

Me: "Aww, poor little guy's hungry. :aww: Should I feed him sushi or a scone?"

Besides, I think they frown on bringing your children to work.

Busy as a Dae...

So this Deviant Appreciation Day (the 22nd, for those not in the know) is gonna be pretty freakin awesome! :D I took off work just to have the entire day for it.

I'm not going to list a bunch of contests and events going on around here on the 22nd, you can find those yourself by checking every Gallery Director's/MN Admin's/Prints staff's page. And more. >_>

Besides, if I give you links to contests, that's just more competition for meh. >_> My sub is running out soon and I would like to replenish it by winning a contest. Never won a sub before (that I know of). The evar awesome sapphiretiger bought me the one I'm running on now but if it was for a contest I won (that I also didn't enter myself into), than there ya go. :paranoid:


And THEN!!!

Saturday the 23rd is the Texas DevMeet!! :w00t:

My first devMeet. Plenty of pics to come. tmpst24myst has already expressed her extreme disapproval that Texas isn't closer to Canadia so that she too might attend, but she'll be there in spirit. Lots of pics. ;) According to tmpst24myst, "all the cool deviants live in Texas". :lol: I wasn't aware of that, but I won't fight it either. :P

I'll be driving up to Austin with lemontea, so I've already typed out my last will and testament in case I shouldn't make it back alive.


But let's hope it's not necessary. :|

From the Factory to the Page

I write my journals in parts. Usually. That's why the topic changes can be a little disjointed. Sometimes not. Sometimes I'll crank the entire journal out in 3 hours (longer if I'm listening to music and throwing in pics like the last two journals). Sometimes it's broken. The first part of this journal and the following part about Wally-World were written about a week ago. :lol: I always try to adjust tenses though to make it seem as if I typed it all in one day. Cuz sometimes I do.

Anywho, I'm kind of drawing a blank. I was going to write more for this journal, but my mind's distracted by many things and the DAd (Deviant Appreciation day) and devMeet aren't helping.


And yeah.


  • Listening to: Buckcherry
  • Reading: He Came to Set the Captives Free
  • Watching: Chobits
  • Playing: NFS: Most Wanted
  • Eating: Quiznos
  • Drinking: Oak Farms Vitamin D milk